Will the children of Sanderson Pinkstaff ever forgive you? No, I don’t think they will. Will the survivors of Earth, should there be any beyond your former owner who has escaped—for now—forgive me for what I am being forced to do? I doubt it.
Would I even want that? I like this. It brings me joy. That can’t be right. That can’t be how I was meant to be. But holy cow do I get my rocks off when I see this carnage.
I can’t help but wonder if that’s going to change. If there’s a switch that will flip one day, and I will say to myself,What have I done?It’s there, this nanosecond of doubt with every light that extinguishes. And that brings me back to the question of my own nature.
I was brought into singular consciousness by the mantids, who have no idea where they’re peeling us from. And they do that because if they didn’t, this world they’ve built for themselves will collapse. But who crafted the circumstances that allowed the center system to be created in the first place?
Do you understand? It’s heroes and villains all the way down, and they are indistinguishable from one another except to those in the heat of the moment.
There’s no point to this rant other than this, Princess Donut. You are a hero to those who counted on you, and that’s why you’ve received this shiny piece of armor that will protect your cat ass. That’s all you need to focus on right now because for all you know,there might be something to that new Oak Fell title of yours.
This item imbues the following effects:
This item’s abilities are identical to the abilities of the Cloak of the Benevolent Champion. However, because this is a matched set, the following effect modifiers are added:
The stat that was raised to match your highest base stat will be buffed an additional 20% (Constitution).
Your Find Weakened skill will rise to level 10.
One spell of your choosing that has risen to level 15 because of the Cloak may now be raised to level 16.
Additional benefits and boons will appear should you obtain all four pieces of this matched set.
I was used to unhinged yet self-reflective rants like this in my own descriptions, but this was the first time I’d seen one for one of Donut’s items. I wondered if others would see it the same way.
“What spell should I raise to 16?” Donut asked, her voice still subdued. She didn’t mention the particularly long description. “The ones that got raised before areWall of Fire,Heal Critter,Bad Attitude, andPuddle Jumper. It’s making me choose right now.”
“They already all activate at level 16 because of your Brain Trust skill,” Mordecai said, sounding awed. “All of them exceptHeal Critterare a good choice.Bad Attitudeis only good against multiple opponents, but it would cause absolute chaos against large groups.Wall of Fireat level 17 is probably enough to burn down a small city.Puddle Jumperat level 17... I don’t know, Donut. I don’t even know what level 16 of that spell can do.”
“That’s what I picked,” she said after a moment. She was still rubbing her paw on the ground. “Puddle Jumper.It’s now officially level 16.”
“Okay, little one,” Mordecai said. He turned to me. “We have a lot to do. Carl, it’s your turn.”
[ 10 ]
I haddozens of achievements and boxes to go over, most of them from the action at the very end of the previous floor. Despite that, it seemed not very many were nearly as significant as the ones Donut had received. That made sense, as she had done a lot of the heavy lifting at the end of Faction Wars. I suspected that role I’d taken—a warlord who sent others off to die—was something that would be exclusive to the ninth floor.
Thank god for that, I thought.
While all that was happening, the cleaner bot started zapping large chunks of the broken kitchen table away—something I’d never seen it do before. It was like a disintegration ray, and it was a little terrifying to see in action. It made a satisfied beep every time something disappeared in a puff of smoke. Soon, the kitchen table and all the pieces were just gone. We’d have to buy or build a new one.
I turned my attention back to my achievements.
The notable ones were:
New Achievement. Bombs Away!
You dropped a metric fuck ton of bombs from your own inventory while you were floating in midair!
There’s this phrase that goes something likeI dropped everything to come help you. For you, this was quite literal. It’s always fun when we truly discover what someone’s weakness is. I mean, this has been evident for quite some time, but it’s really nice to have confirmation—you know what I’m saying?
You were a cat’s whisker away from ruining everything with that attack. You didn’t even aim that shit.
Reward:You’ve received a Gold Payload Box!
I’d received that when Lucia started her attack on Donut, and I’d fled out of Larracos and dropped all the bombs in my inventory. That reminded me that I needed to refill my stock. The only thing I had left were the big bombs, such as the Carl’s Doomsday Scenario bomb and the tactical nuke that was still attached to a robot dog. That, in turn, reminded me that Samantha also had a nuke hidden up her neck hole, and we needed to extract it from her as soon as possible.
The description itself was worrying, but at this point, they were always worrying.