“My goodness,” Donut said a moment later. “It’s at level 17! 17! I thought it topped out at 15!”
Mordecai nodded. His head creaked, reminding me of Orren. “It’s from the gods, and when it comes to gods, all bets are off. With your buffed constitution, you’ve gone from a ranged powerhouse to one of the most powerful melee fighters in the game’s history. Or you can use yourAstral Pawspell to cut through almost anything. It should make the mobs on this floor pretty easy.” He paused. “But the game has a way ofcompensating for overpowered crawlers on the tenth floor and beyond. Believe me. Don’t get complacent.”
Donut continued to hold up her paw. She’d stiffened at the mention ofAstral Paw. “Blue,” she muttered. “These stupid claw caps better mute the glow.”
“They’re a little translucent, so I bought the red ones,” Rosetta said, putting the four caps on the table. “I’m not sure your species can see the same color spectrum as a Crest, but with that glow, it should?—”
“A cat’s vision is vastly superior to the vision of any other living creature,” Donut said, sniffing suspiciously at the little caps. “Are you sure these work?”
“They’ll work,” Mordecai said. “This is what they’re for. You’ll be able to take them off and arm them via your inventory. Just be careful.”
The caps disappeared into Donut’s inventory and then appeared on her claws. The blue light was now muted and purple. She gave another harrumph. “I better be able to retract...” She retracted her claws and hesitantly put her foot down. “Huh. I suppose this will have to do.” She rubbed the paw on the ground a few times.
“What was the other spell book you got?” I asked, hoping to change her focus.
She brightened. The book thumped onto the table. “It’s an Elle spell!”
I picked it up. The thing was freezing cold.
“Ice Slick,”I said. It created a one-inch-thick ice covering on the ground in a wide area depending on one’s intelligence level and the level of the spell. I’d seen this spell used a few times now. This was a special edition, so it started at level 5 and trained faster. “This is great. Okay, what about your new crupper thing?” I asked.
Donut’s existing crupper—the Enchanted Fae-Scale Quadruped Crupper of the Fleet—had been on her backside since the goblin-baby incident on the very first floor. In addition to the basic protection a butt covered with scale mail provided, it had given her +2 in dexterity, which was great at the time, but was laughably weak now.
She removed the mail, briefly revealing the shaved patch of skin with the tattoo of the dog licking itself. The dog seemed to pause upon realizing he or she was now exposed, but I never got a chance to examine it as the new armor appeared.
“It’s much lighter, I must say. More elegant,” Donut said, waving her backside. I reached over and helped her fluffy tail pop up over the armor.
The chain mail was similar, but there was an opalescent glow to the armor.
“Carl,” Donut suddenly cried, “I just got an achievement for wearing a matched set! It says if I can find the last piece, I get a fourth piece as a reward! And...” She trailed off, her eyes flashing. And suddenly she was stiff again. She sat, and she started to lick her paw. “It’s a very nice item,” she said.
It didn’t take long for me to figure out what had upset her. It was the item’s description.
You fucking asshole,I thought.
Enchanted crupper. The Crupper of the Benevolent Champion.
This is a unique item.
This item is part of a matched set with the Cloak of the Benevolent Champion. There are two more pieces to this set. Find the third, and the fourth will be awarded in a box. Considering what you did to get this one, it’s gotta be somethingreallygood.
This item was originally awarded in a celestial slap-chop box during the ninth floor.
Let’s talk about what a hero is.
You, Donut, received this prize because you performed one of the most brutal kills in the history of this game. Do you know how much gore that attack generated? Do you know what happens to teeth when they’re pushed through a chain? Can you believe kids watch this shit?
Do you know who you killed in that attack? Fathers. Mothers. Children.
Take, for instance, Sanderson Pinkstaff. He was a gnoll mercenary that had worked for the Tagg household for the majority of his life. He was the quartermaster aboard theRecalcitrantwhen the call for mercenaries to fight Faction Wars went out, and he was reluctantly brought to the surface to fight for the Dream. He sent every credit he earned home to help pay for the fees to keep his pack’s habitat oxygenated.
He also was the last surviving member of the attack. When he died, and the atrocity was complete, you, Princess Donut, were called a hero by all of those who were saved.
And that is something I can’t stop thinking about. Has there ever been a real hero who was a hero to all? Certainly Sanderson Pinkstaff’s children won’t call you one.
This is where I’d usually stop thinking about this particular question, laying the blame squarely at your paws. But we all know you didn’t ask to be put in that position. You did what you had to do. Your paw was forced.
And this is where I would blame myself for about a nanosecond. This is not something I like to do. I don’t like feeling bad about myself. But the more Ithink about it, the more I learn about my own true nature, the more I realize I am just like you in that tower, committing atrocities because you have no other choice.