He wasn’t looking forward to it. The thought of lying there and feeling empty and needy wasn’t appetizing. Sometimes imagining Adew helped, but other times it made it worse because his body knew it wasn’t real. His alpha was gone, and he wasn’t coming back. The tears he’d fought filled his eyes and spilled over.
“Dammit,” Nylune whimpered, stopping in his tracks. He’d been roaming around the house again. He couldn’t help himself. Standing still just brought the memories back, and it was unbearable. “Keep moving,” he told himself as he made his way to his office.
A chiming sound filled the silence. Nylune turned to the door with a frown. He wasn’t expecting anyone. His heart did a little dance as he thought of Adew, even though he knew it wasn’t him at the door. He moved to the screen and silently groaned when he saw Hazi.
“Open up, Ny. I can hear you breathing,” he said,
Nylune rolled his eyes and snatched the door open. “What are you doing here? You were here two days ago. Don’t you have things to do?”
“I was worried about you. Sue me!” Hazi walked inside and headed to the cooking station. Nylune closed the door and followed him there. “Did you eat?”
“I did,” he lied. But of course, Hazi saw through it.
“Sit,” Hazi said, pointing to the chair at the counter. He opened the takeout plates and placed them in front of him. “Eat.”
Nylune opened his mouth to speak, but Hazi gave him a silencing look. He sat down and gulped down the food, feeling suddenly hungry.
Hazi stared at him strangely.
“What?”
“Are you okay, Ny?”
He wasn’t. But maybe one day he will be. “I’m fine, Hazi. You don’t have to worry about me.”
“You look better than two days ago. I guess that’s something,” he said. Nylune could tell Hazi wanted to say more, but he just pushed the food close to him. They sat there in silence while he ate and Hazi just had to ruin it.
“Have you seen this?” he asked, pushing his connector in front of him. Adew’s large frame came into view. Nylune quickly looked away. He’d avoided looking Adew up because it was hard thinking about him, seeing him would be devastating. “He’s going back to UA. The media is going crazy. They’re calling his return a miracle.”
Nylune nodded. Hazi groaned, clearly not getting the reaction he wanted.
“I don’t understand you sometimes,” he pouted. “If I were you, I would have held on to that alpha for dear life.”
“You don’t want to be me, Hazi,” Nylune said sadly. “No one does.”
Chapter 18
Adew
Eight months later.
The roar of the crowd vibrated through him, echoing around the sphere. Adew bounced on the balls of his feet as he stared at the gate, waiting for his opponent, his body burning with anticipation. He slammed his gloved fists together, energy thrumming through his veins. He lived for this moment when his aggression thickened his muscles and made all his senses sharp. After eight long months of hard work, he was finally here. He was back where he belonged, having his first match after a year off. He’d thought he would be happy, over the moon for achieving the impossible, but he wasn’t. Something was missing. He didn’t feel the same all-consuming drive to win and dominate. The thrill to be in the cage was still there, but it did not feel the same. It wasn’t the drug that it once was.
“Are you ready,” Xylo asked, stepping in front of him. His eyes were tense and sharp, looking him over. “Focus. It’s time to prove to them who the fuck you are.”
Adew nodded. He bumped his forehead with his fist and shook his arms out.
“Focus,” he told himself as the music started and his opponent Wulfric came down the aisle. Adew sized him up, taking in his massive form and lethal eyes. The alpha was fourth in line for a title match. If he defeated him, he would be given the chance to go up the ranks. If he lost, he could count his chance of a title match goodbye.
Wulfric was strong and skilled, but Adew was better. As soon as he stepped into the cage everything became a blur as he gave himself to his aggression. Wulfric came at him with everything he had. Adew grunted as he slammed into him and went crazy with his fists.
“Move,” he heard Xylo shout from outside the sphere. Adew moved to get out of the way, but Wulfric wrapped his arms around him, and squeezed.
Oh shit, he thought as his body seized up, reliving the moment Djohn Moulekk turned his lights out. Fear gripped him, and he felt his back tingle.
The sphere went silent, as if everyone could sense he was in trouble.
Adew closed his eyes and tried to will the fear away. Nylune’s face swirled in his mind. Fuck, he missed him. The last time he’d seen him was when they’d removed his claiming mark, erasing everything they’d been through with a red capsule that Dr Micha had given them, breaking their mating bond. He’d felt so empty afterwards. He still did.