Beck was taking a second to clean up the grill and close it up.
“You want a beer?”
“No beer. Milk?”
He rolled his eyes. “Seriously? We’re sticking with that?”
Although the truth was, it felt really good, the way Beck cared enough to pay attention.
“Damn right we’re sticking with that.” Beck pinned him with a look. “I definitely do not want to piss Kevin off.”
“He’s more bark than bite.” Skyler made it to the fridge and grabbed the milk, balancing it carefully on his walker. “Still, he’s one of the white hats, you know?”
“He cares. He’s in your corner. That can be a rare thing these days.”
Kevin put in a drop of sweat for every one of his own.
Beck put a dish of potatoes on the table along with a plate of asparagus, both of which he’d pulled out of the fridge. The damned thing was packed to the gills with food in Tupperware and foil.
He wanted to help, but he found himself standing there and watching, numb and sparkly around the edges.
“Go sit, babe. You need to eat.” Beck shooed him out of the kitchen, following with their plates.
“I’m sorry. I do. I’m…stupid.” Maybe the wreck had broke his brain.
“Tired. Meds. Fresh air. Past your usual bedtime.” Beck put his plate down in front of him and took a quick kiss. “So we’ll eat, and then I’ll get you in bed. Maybe put on a movie…not that I would expect you to stay awake that long.”
“I’m still getting used to things.”Because the whole world is different now.
“I know. Stop beating yourself up about it and eat. You just don’t have as much energy as you used to.” Beck straightened up, arms crossing. “So…do you need me to cut your steak?”
“Shut up, dickmunch.” They stared at each other for a few long seconds, and then the laughter started, both of them howling with it.
“Dammit, I’m not even sure that’s appropriate anymore, it’s been so long.” Beck sat and took a big sip of water before picking up a steak knife.
“I know, right? Your mouth is amazing.” Sky could play this game with the best of them, and Beck was hella smarter than him. “Of course, I like your ass too. And riding you good and hard doesn’t suck.”
Lips twitching, Beck froze, hands hovering over his plate for a second, then Beck sniffed and dug into the steak. “That’s not fair.”
Oh, shit.Beck wasn’t playing along.
He shut his mouth and got to eating, focusing on the potatoes, because there was no way he was going to choke down the steak, not right now.
Sky watched Beck take a couple of bites and poke around with his fork, not looking up from his plate. The silence in the dining room was almost painful and seemed to go on for ages.
“I’m sorry, man.” He stood up and grabbed his plate. He’d wrap it up and eat after Beck went to bed maybe. He’d never been good at keeping his mouth shut, and it didn’t appear like he was fixin’ to learn soon.
Beck stood up with him. “Sit, Sky. Please. I’m sorry. Please sit. You need to eat.”
“I didn’t mean to fuck up your steak.” He tried to balance him and the plate and the walker and his apology, all at the same time.
“It’s just that I want you, Sky. Really want you.” Beck took his plate and set it down on the table a little harder than Sky would have expected. “I didn’t think I would…need you like this. I thought it would be easier, but you’re right there and I remember everything. I remember you. You smell the same, you feel the same. I had my arms around you earlier and I…want you.” Beck stepped away from the table looking a little horrified by that flow of words. “I’m sorry. You—I’ll go.”
“Go where? Who says we can’t want? I mean, I can’t fuck you or ride you, but I remember how to suck and my hand works.” Beck complicated shit. He remembered that. Sometimes it was amazing. Sometimes it made things hard.
Not a good hard, a difficult hard.
“Right. I know. Sorry.” Beck sank into his chair. “I don’t have much of a sense of humor, do I? I guess I’m a little tired too.”