“The cliffs?”
“Yeah. You didn’t show for the barn opening. I was worried. Calum told me to look for you here.”
“Calum.”
It wasn’t a question this time, and slowly but surely, cognition returned to Kim’s usually keen green eyes.
He ripped his hands from me and covered his face, groaning. “Fuck.”
I rubbed his damp leg. “It’s okay. We can fix it. How much did you drink?”
“Drink?” Kim revealed his face again. “I didn’t drink anything.”
“No?” Stress sharpened my tone. “So why were you passed out on a bench in the rain?”
“I—” Kim glanced around. “Shit. How long have I been here?”
“I don’t know. Do you remember coming up here?”
Kim nodded. “I came out for a walk.”
“When you were drunk?”
“I’m not fucking drunk, Jas!”
His shout was sudden and loud, even with the vicious wind swirling around us. I flinched and shrank back. He caught my arm. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”
“Then tell me what happened, Kim. Please? I can’t help you if you don’t.”
His only answer was a violent shiver, reminding me that we were both wet through and exposed to the elements—him more than me, and Christ knew how long he’d been out here.
I coaxed him to his feet, steadying him as he wavered. “Come on. Let’s get warm.”
He didn’t protest as I led him to my car, which, because I’d left the engine running, was thankfully still warm. I sat him in the passenger seat and slammed the door harder than I’d intended, helped along by the wind, then got in the driver’s side.
Kim’s head was down, his eyes closed. I touched his arm, rousing him. “Okay?”
He nodded slowly. “Where are we going?”
“Home.”
And by that, I meant my place, where I knew where every drop of booze was, and could easily dispose of it the moment we walked through the door.
We made the journey in silence; me focussed on the road, Kim staring dazedly out of the window. If he was surprised to find himself at my flat a little while later, it didn’t show. I steered him inside and helped him out of his wet clothes. “Shower. Warm yourself up. Don’t lock the door, though, in case you fall.”
“I’m not going to fall.”
He drifted away before I could answer. I waited for him to slam the bathroom door, but he didn’t. He left it open and turned the shower on, and after a few minutes, I poked my head around the door to find him sitting in the bath, his face hidden in his knees.
The sight of him broke me, and the frustration I’d felt since the car park melted away if, indeed, it had ever truly been there at all. Kim’s addiction was an illness, and I wouldn’t let him suffer alone.
I joined him in the shower and turned the heat up to properly warm his bones. At first, he didn’t seem to notice me gently rubbing shampoo through his hair, even when I slid my fingers over his scalp to the base of his neck, kneading. It was a while before his quiet sigh broke the silence.
“That feels nice.”
“Good.” I rose up on my knees, ignoring how my body naturally responded to being so close to Kim, and massaged his shoulders. “Enjoy it while you warm up. I’m usually too amorous around you to be this nice.”
“You’re always nice.”