She closed her eyes and tried to find that cold, logical voice in her head. The one that had been saying exactly what Kekoa just did. But it was nowhere to be found.
She felt only longing – and a fierce sense of despair that had risen up in response to his unexpected rejection.
His hand came to rest lightly on the side of her jaw, and her eyes flew open.
“Laurie…” He said her name slowly, his eyes focused on her lips. “If I taste you once, if I hold you in my arms, I’ll never want to let go.”
He broke off and stepped back, looking her in the eyes.
“I’m one bad decision away from falling madly in love with you.”
“Are you saying that falling in love with me would be a bad decision?” She tried to make the question light, like a joke – but her throat was so tight, she knew that there was no humor in her voice at all.
“Only if you don’t feel the same way.” His voice had gone so quiet that she had to fall back on reading his lips in the dim light.
It was difficult to stare at his mouth, at his day-bright teeth and the hard line of his jaw, without wanting to close the distance between them.
She had ignored this simmering tension for an entire year. She had gotten very good at pretending that it didn’t exist at all. She had maintained a careful distance, always.
But now… just a few seconds of contact and a few minutes of honesty, and there was no putting that monster back in the box. She felt a fierce longing to go to him, to feel his hands on her skin again.
Laurie was a rational, logical person.
She had never burned for someone the way she did in that moment.
The feeling was overwhelming. She didn’t know what to make of it.
She didn’t know what to say, and her heart sank as she watched Kekoa’s face fall.
“I don’t think you feel the same way about me that I feelabout you,” he said.
She opened her mouth, but her voice was stuck in her throat.
Maybe she did. Maybe she didn’t. How could she possibly know?
He’d said that he loved her.
Did she love him? Was that what this was, this wanting?
Or was it something more fleeting, less trustworthy?
How could she know if they never tried?
“I want you,” she said, her voice faint.
“That’s not the same thing.”
“That’s not– I don’t just– I want you in my life.”
“I want you in my life too.” He softened, some of the tension melting out of his shoulders. “Laurie, I’d marry you tomorrow.”
She took a startled step back.
“See?” He smiled sadly and gestured at the distance between them.
“See what?” A sudden anger rose up in her chest, burning away some of the haze that had addled her brain. “It’s marriage or nothing? That’s crazy!”
“I’m not trying to rush you. I haven’t pushed you at all. I had resigned myself to just being your friend.”