Jessica made a soft, mewling sound, then yawned and twisted to look at him. For half a second, she smiled. Then she must have remembered she was pissed off at him.
“Where have you been?” she asked, her voice and body still heavy from sleep as she pushed to sit on the other end of the couch. Her glare would have been cute and kittenish if it wasn’t a precursor to what was sure to be a ton of real hurt and anger in just a few seconds.
“I spent the night with Lee,” Drew said, upfront from the start. She wasn’t going to like what he had to say, but he wasn’t going to give her any reason to say he wasn’t being honest with her.
“You could have called a taxi to bring you back here,” Jessica said with a frown, not putting the pieces together yet.
“No, Jess,” Drew said, heart feeling like it was beating in his throat. “I mean, Ispent the nightwith Lee.” He looked directly at her, hoping she would figure it out without him painting a picture.
“You just said that,” she huffed in exasperation, standing and heading into the kitchen. “I’m surprised he put up with you after you were such a jerk.”
Drew squeezed his eyes closed and waited a few seconds before standing. He couldn’t tell if Jessica was being obtuse on purpose to avoid the conversation that was about to happen or if she really didn’t get it.
“I’m sorry if you felt like I was a jerk last night,” he said, hoping to start the conversation well by validating her feelings, even if she was the one who had behaved questionably. “That wasn’t my intention.”
“I don’t like it when you throw yourself around with fans,” Jessica said, turning to face him once she’d gotten a glass of water from the tap. “How do you think that makes me feel?”
Drew leaned against the kitchen counter, kind of the way he had at Lee’s place, but with an entirely different set of emotions coursing through him. Jessica drank her water and did everything she could to avoid looking at him. As soon as she set the glass down, she walked away from him, heading for the bathroom.
“Jess, stop,” he said, trying not to lose his patience with her. “You know we need to talk, and you know what the conversation is going to be about.”
Jessica stopped and made a squeaking sound. When she turned back to Drew, she looked like she was about to burst into tears. “I came all the way back here to be with you,” she said, voice tight.
“I know,” Drew said quietly, “but maybe you shouldn’t have.”
Her bottom lip wobbled. “Don’t do this to me, Drew,” she said taking a step back toward him. “I love you. We’ve been together for years. We’re great together. We’re going to be a Hollywood power couple.”
Drew’s eyes went wide. “We can’t be a Hollywood power couple. The world thinks I’m gay. That was partially your idea. And actually?—”
“We’ll find a way to change the narrative,” she cut him off. “Like, we’ll say I turned you straight or something.”
Not only was the idea ridiculous, it was insulting.
“Jess,” Drew appealed to her, leaving the kitchen and walking over to her. “You know things haven’t been great between us for a long time now, even before all the craziness ofCookedtook off.”
“No.” She shook her head and backed away from him. “This is not how I’m starting my day. We’ve been together for years. We’re a solid couple.”
“We aren’t,” Drew said, so many feelings he’d kept bottled up spilling out all over the place as he faced the truth he’d been avoiding for at least a year now. “We used to be a solid couple when we were younger and still on the same page. But we started growing apart a while ago. We’ve each become very different people who want different things.”
“But I want you,” Jessica said, bursting into tears. “You’re amazing and perfect, and everybody loves you.”
Her words hit him all wrong. “I’m just me.” He took a step toward her again and brushed his hands along her arms, stopping short of hugging her. “I…I think maybe you’re in love with the public image that’s been created around me and not me anymore.”
“That’s not true!” She took a step back, jerking away from him. “You’re Drew Oberlin. You’re hot and funny and brash. Youembrace life and get what you want from it because you’re kind and modest and talented.”
Everything she said would have sounded great, if it hadn’t been exactly the things he’d discussed with his PR team months ago, when his star started its ridiculous ascent.
“I’m also a person with fears and anxiety,” he said, holding his hands out to his sides. “I’m trying to figure out who I am now with everyone in the world looking at me and thinking they know me. I know I’m not who you think I am, because I’m still struggling to figure out who I am. I’m not who I thought I was.”
“What does that even mean?” Jessica huffed, wiping tears away from her cheeks. “You’re Drew Oberlin. You’re my boyfriend.”
“I’m not your boyfriend,” Drew said, frustrated that he was having such a hard time communicating something that seemed so obvious to him. Then again, Jessica was afraid. She was facing just as much of an unknown as he was. She was facing herself without him. “I haven’t been a good boyfriend for a while. We should have broken up a year ago.”
“No. I refuse to accept that.” Jessica burst into tears again. “We’ll just forget this whole conversation happened and go back to the way things were.”
“We can’t do that,” Drew said, already exhausted by the conversation. “My feelings for you have changed. I’m not in love with you anymore.” It felt harsh to say that, but he knew everything he had to say next was even harsher. “I spent the night with Lee last night. In his bed. Together.” He didn’t want to spell things out any more than that.
Jessica glared at him. Then she blinked. Then her eyes went wide. “Oh my god. Did you have sex with him?”