Lunar_Warden
He deserves much worse.
Me
I feel him, though. Still. It’s never gone away. I’ve lived with the feeling for months, anticipating today, figuring when he got punished, it’d fix me and this, but it isn’t.
Lunar_Warden
Can I call you?
Talking over the phone won’t conceal the truth for long, so I hesitate for the same reasons I avoided going to Levi’s apartment. He’ll try to protect me from my emotions, no matter the means.
Hunter would never judge me.
It was a couple years ago when we ended up in the same gaming campaign. And then again, and again. Eventually, I formed a strange online friendship withLunar_Warden, whose name I later learned to be Hunter.
And then later, I realized that was another lie.
Given that online friendships are almost always a horrible idea, I kept firm boundaries. But after a particularly hard day of listening to voicemails from Dad, instead of calling Levi with my issues—who, at the time, was running errands for his parents—I messaged my cell phone number to Hunter through the chat within the gaming platform.
He took the hint and texted me.
Between the many conversations and eventual phone calls—despite the attempt to alter his voice—I learned one very interesting thing about Hunter.
He’s Levi.
It wasn’t any one thing he said that tipped me off, but a deep-rooted sense in my gut, combined with an altered voice that occasionally slipped up.
Levi invented this second personality and got close to me. Since ‘Hunter’ was told my legal name a while ago, he’s aware who he’s actually speaking to. When I figured it out, I was so confused and shocked, I nearly confronted him, but since he clearly had his reasons, I let him continue the lie. Plus, I’m curious. It became fun, and then something impossible to let go of.
There are two sides to Levi: what he presents, and Hunter—and I’m in love with both of them. But Levi is a Westwood, controlled by his parents, stuck in the best friend role neither of us can ever break. Hunter, however, is…mine.
He’s mine. He’s different. Hunter is how I get to be closer to Levi in ways well beyond our physical friendship. His family would never approve of us dating, but in this secret life, they don’t have to know. If anythingdidhappen between me and Levi, and it didn’t work out, I wouldn’t survive losing him.
So, to protect both us and my heart, I’ve never disclosed knowing the truth. Instead, they’re two separate men in my mind, two separate people I reference by their individual names and experience differently.
My phone vibrates, reminding me of the still-waiting text—Hunter’s question about a phone call. As Hunter, he’s less likely to push, and I need that.
I type back a single word:
Yes.
THREE
LEVI
The minute I arrived home,I messaged her, knowingexactlywhat she was avoiding by not staying over. She once admitted to my secondary persona that she isn’t as open with the real me because she fears judgement, despite the numerous reassurances I’ve given.
Lunar_Wardenwas invented to get closer to her in ways I knew she’d never allow Levi Westwood. It wasn’t supposed to go on for so long. The intention was to drive her into my arms and then back away, becoming the virtual friend who’s never heard from again.
It may be deceptive, but my determination will get through to her one way or the other. No matter what it takes, she’ll become mine.
As Hunter, my ‘real name’ forLunar_Warden, different sides of Summer were introduced. She admits thingsaboutLevi she’d never to my face—like believing she isn’t good enough for me when that couldn’t be further from the truth.
By breathing, she’s worthy of me.
Once our friendship moved from the gaming platform to exchanging real cell numbers—which I had to acquire a second phone for—I couldn’t stop.