As I took a seat at the dining table to watch someSeinfeldreruns, I was thankful to get a text from someone I could actually see myself having a good time with.
Tina: So, how about that drink?
Me: Tomorrow night?
Tina: Sounds good to me. Ever been to Mountain Breath?
Me: Love that bar. See you at seven?
Tina: Can’t wait.
* * *
I spentmost of my day doing chores around the house and signing up for classes. As I got ready for my date with Tina, I couldn’t stop my nerves. I hadn’t been on a real date in as long as I could remember. Skye and I had always tried to implement date night, but our schedules hardly aligned enough for us to even squeeze in having Chinese takeout together.
I changed my shirt four times, put on way more cologne than any man should ever wear, and stared at my shoe options for at least five minutes before settling on my favorite pair of loafers.
“You can do this,” I said to myself in the mirror as I massaged beard oil into my growing whiskers.
I sat down at the bar and Marty greeted me with, “Hey Jack, the usual?”
“You do make the best old fashions in town.”
“I’ll take that compliment proudly.”
“Hello, sir. Come here often?” Tina giggled as she hopped onto the barstool next to me.
“You look gorgeous as always.” Her long blonde locks were curled, she had a least a pound of makeup on, and she was rocking a little black number that left nothing to the imagination. Suddenly, I felt completely inadequate.
“What’re you drinking?” I asked after shamelessly checking out my former secretary.
“White wine, please. Something sweet,” Tina responded.
“Coming right up, little lady.” Marty had a wine glass in front of her within seconds.
“Thanks.” Tina smiled before turning to me. “I’ve been hoping you’d ask me out since day one, if I’m being honest.”
“Really? I always pictured you with an Abercrombie model or some shit like that.”
She took a sip before laughing. “Guys like that have the personality of a wet paper towel.”
“So, Tina, I feel like we worked together for months and I know so little about you.”
“Well, I am really into celebrity fashion and makeup. I follow all the trendiest blogs and try to replicate the looks.”
“Cool. What do you do for fun?” I felt like I was embarking on a round of twenty questions.
“What do you mean? I just told you.”
And there ya have it folks, the end of the riveting conversation for the night. Tina really had nothing to talk about other than gossip about Kim Kardashian and other celebrities I couldn’t have cared less about. It was a painful hour of me sitting there, nursing my drink as she went on and on about the sex tape scandal and how it really helped the Kardashians break into fame.
I forced a yawn and pretended to check my watch. “I feel like it’s two in the morning,” I joked.
“The night is still young. We should go dancing. I love dancing.” Tina slurped down her fourth glass of Riesling.
“I think it’s time for this old dog to head to bed.”
“Oh, come on,” she complained.