I eyed Quemada, and I moved to chat to explain everything that had just happened. I held up my hand, showing the swirl pattern.
After I was done, the chat exploded.
Elle: Fucking hell, Carl. Hanging out with you is as dangerous as hanging out with Samantha. Also, I don’t trust that mercenary you hired. You can’t trust fire fairies.
Imani: When have we even faced a fire fairy? That sounds like something Donut would say.
Donut: I DON’T LIKE FIRE FAIRIES, EITHER. I LIKE OLGA AND FINLEY A LOT. BUT THIS FIRE LADY REMINDS ME OF AN EXOTIC SHORTHAIR OWNER. AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.
Elle: No, I don’t know what that means. But I kinda do, too.
Donut: EXACTLY.
Prepotente: Interesting. This is a similar conundrum to the Donut and Katia problem. I will think on it.
Louis: Britney hasn’t been acting any different. She’s just been grumpy. But she’s always grumpy.
Florin: Do you think this goddess was implying that she knew the full story with Lucia?
Carl: Look. We do need to sit down and come up with a plan to deal with all this. I already have a couple ideas I want to float, but you have to promise to hear me out. It’s not fully... it’s not fully baked yet. I can’t even say the last part in chat. But maybe the answer is right in front of us. Let’s talk to these war mages first.
[ 37 ]
EnteringChicken and Waffles and Upgrades.
Warning: This location is exempt from the local safe room rules.
The place was a typical diner. Even though the whole town had this aesthetic from the 1980s filmBlade Runner, the restaurant gave the 1950s, at least at first glance. There was an overabundance of neon within. The jukebox was playing that “Fame” song from the movie.
The workers weren’t gremlins but flightless imps, which were similar but a little smaller.
“Hi, folks,” an imp with a gaudy rockabilly wig said as we entered. Her name was Darla-Dean, and she was rapidly chewing gum. She started counting all of us. “I’ll get a big table together, but it’s gonna take a minute. I’ll get you some menus.” She looked at Donut and popped her gum. “How many kiddie menus do we need?”
“Kiddie menu?” Donut asked, incredulous. “Do I look like someone who eats off the kiddie menu?”
“Wait,” Louis said. “I want to see one.”
“And a drink menu,” Prepotente added.
“I want a kiddie menu, too,” Samantha announced.
“Samantha!” I said, looking at the doll head with surprise. She was suddenly just there on the floor. “Where did you come from?” She had not been with us just before when Eris appeared.
The imp started handing out menus.
Samantha ignored me and rolled up to Louis. She grunted a few times and jumped up to Louis’s shoulder. She spent a moment watching the reverse tooth fairy zip around Imani’s head like a fly. She turned her attention to the Porsuk and then stage-whispered in Louis’s ear, “I want you to know that Finley attempted to seduce me, and I was enticed, but I resisted his lurid advances. Still, if you kill him in a jealous rage, I would think it was really hot.”
Louis looked up at the Porsuk, eyes wide.
“Don’t worry,” the badger said. “I already got her figured out.”
Olga muttered something about wanting to charge quadruple, not triple.
“Hey,” Samantha said, looking down at the menu clutched in Louis’s hands, “there aren’t any children on here at all.”
“They’re on the other side, honey,” Darla-Dean said.
Louis hesitantly flipped the menu over.