Associated Spell:Temporary Macaroni. Casts at level 14.
The light turned green, Gluteus hit the accelerator, tires squealed, and we were off.
We had twenty minutes to go thirty kilometers.
I fell backward, my back smashing into the closer of the two ghoul cages. The ghoul within shout-groaned as the truck started to buck and bounce.
Crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch.
We shook heavily as we plowed over and through the rushing sugar skulls. We quickly outpaced them.
The engine roared, the gauges maxed out, and we kept accelerating. The entire truck started to shimmy.
If Gluteus so much as tweaked that steering wheel, we were going to flip.
“Keep it steady!” I yelled.
“You know it, baby! Like fucking a needle! Faster! Faster!”
“Dr. Metcalf,” I bellowed as I pulled myself into a standing position, “shout when the invulnerability is about to run out!”
“And play some fucking music!” Gluteus hollered. He leaned forward so his chest was pressed against the steering wheel.
“Slow down!” Donut shrieked. “Gluteus, you’re going too fast!”
“Mayhaps you’d like a calming massage, my princess?” Dorota asked.
“Not now, Dorota!”
You know what? I do think we need music. This feels like an appropriate song. Anything to shut that chair up.
Some Halloween-sounding techno heavy metal song started to blast. I’d definitely heard it before, but I couldn’t remember the title. It was a car-racing song about witches and ditches.
Gluteus started pounding the dash with his hairy hand. Donut shouted something as we bounced up and down.
“Shut that off!” I yelled, but nobody could hear me. We didn’t have time. I turned toward the back of the truck to prepare the cages.
Donut: HOW IS THIS EVEN PLAYING? WHERE ARE THE SPEAKERS?
“Okay, guys,” I shouted at the two ghouls. They looked at me blankly, likely unable to hear me over the music. One had his hands over his ears. “We’re doing this!”
I grabbed the first lever we’d built into the floor of the truck, and I yanked. The back door burst open as the first cage popped out, suspended over the road on a reinforced beam like a fishing pole. I pulled the chain on the ceiling, which swung the beam toward the driver’s side of the truck, moving the cage so it hung outside over open road, just behind, shaking and dangling like a lantern. I quickly secured the chain on the embedded hook. I shoved the second cage, and it glided smoothly out. I pulled this second chain, and the arm pivoted, swinging the second cage out to the opposite side. I secured the chain, locking it all in place.
I rushed back and slid out the door stabilizer, which kept the back door from swinging back and forth.
Both ghouls were now suspended in cages that dangled on either side of the truck, making it look like we had wings. The ghouls within dropped the front trapdoors, which would allow them to lean out and toss their potion balls. I could yank on a third chain, which would raise the driver’s-side cage like it was on a crane, bringing it up higher than the height of the truck.
This whole pulley-and-lever system was an engineering marvel cobbled together by Hedy, and it allowed for the deployment and quick retraction of the twin defensive positions while not changing the integrity of the truck itself. The entire system was secured inside the kitchen.
With that done, we still had a good forty seconds left on the invulnerability.
We’d left One Fine Pig far behind, but the Lady Dominators’ car was right there, zooming up behind us. Team Free Love’s van was also bouncing along behind the Dominator team. Both thearmored dog and the bear were way back there, as far back as One Fine Pig. If they didn’t get free soon, they’d both get taken out by the little monsters.
I couldn’t see team Sparkles anywhere. I leaned out the back, straining, but there was no sign of them.
I started to shout, but nobody could hear me.
Carl: Do you see team Sparkles?