“Carl, what is a ‘heat’? That sounds obscene.”
The gremlins were suddenly there, both looking worried. One was a female gremlin named Hedy, and the other a male named Waldrip Chris. They both started talking at once, shouting about us having to quickly make a choice. These shouts turned to a scuffle, and then, out of nowhere, they were beating the shit out of each other as they continued to shout at us. I could barely understand either of them. The woman gremlin had been lugging a red toolbox, but she’d dropped it to the ground the moment they’d started to fight. The man had some sort of vegetable in his hand. It was a tan-colored gourd, and he was now attempting to bash it over the head of the woman gremlin.
I quickly examined them.
Hedy. Gremlin. Level 30 vehicle mechanic.
This is an applicant to be manager of your garage.
This is a non-combatant NPC.
Hedy is an expert in all things mechanical. If you choose a mechanical-based vehicle, she will be in charge of your garage. Don’t let her appearance fool you. She’s about as experienced as one can get when it comes to engines. If you can limp your vehicle back to the garage, rest assured it’ll be good as new by the time the next heat starts.
Warning: Just because Hedy is a non-combatant NPC, it doesn’t mean she’s invulnerable. If something happens to her, your vehicle will not get repaired between heats.
Hedy is not allowed to enter your safe room.
The second description was similar.
Waldrip Chris. Gremlin. Level 30 animal trainer.
This is an applicant to be manager of your garage.
This is a non-combatant NPC.
Waldrip Chris is an expert in all things biological. If you choose a flesh-based vehicle, he will be in charge of your garage. From a minor case of the sniffles to appendage amputation, he will make certain your trusty mount is ready for the next heat.
Waldrip Chris had the same set of warnings.
The two gremlins continued to roll across the garage floor. Waldrip Chris had Hedy pinned and was smacking her over the head with his gourd thing as she blindly reached for her toolbox.
As soon as I finished reading both descriptions, a new message popped up.
Your party leader must choose the manner of vehicle. Mechanical or biological. Once you choose between the two, you will spin the wheel for the specific vehicle chassis or creature.
“A vehicle?” Donut said incredulously. “I have theTwinkle Toesspell and a level 15Heal Critter. Mongo won’t like another animal in the party, but it’s probably the best choice.”
“Pet spells don’t work on special mounts,” Hedy the gremlin gasped from the floor. She managed to grasp her toolbox and reach inside. She pulled out a mallet that was much too big to have fit in the box. With a shout of triumph, she swung the giant mallet, clocking the other gremlin. She remained on the floor, panting. “NeitherTwinkle ToesnorHeal Critterwill work on them!”
The other gremlin growled as he scrambled up. He bled profusely from a cut on his head. He still held the gourd. “Don’t tell them that, you bitch!” He jumped at the prone woman like a wrestler leaping from the ropes, gourd held over his head before he smashed it on his opponent’s face. The vegetable thing broke into pieces, and tiny bugs spilled out and crawled all over her. The woman gremlin shrieked, wiping them off with herfree hand as she writhed. She blindly swung her mallet, almost catching me in the foot.
“It’s the truth, jackass,” she called as she sputtered.
“Carl, what is happening?” Donut demanded.
“Uh, I think they’re both applying for a job.”
We had one minute left.
“My goodness, you two. Quit fighting!” Donut called. “Carl, I’m starting to feel the definition of ‘non-combatant’ is very loose.”
“What did you call me, you unshaven hedge creeper?” Waldrip Chris bellowed as he punched Hedy in the face with a closed fist. There was a terrible crunch.
“What aboutRepairandFixscrolls and potions?” I asked.
“Nope,” Waldrip Chris said triumphantly as he continued to pound her. He grunted with each punch. “All vehicles are proprietary to the arena. Ever seen a Charm Wombat? You can’t get better handling than one of those furry bastards. And with a few upgrades... Ooof!”
He didn’t finish before the mallet once again connected with his head with a wetsmack. He tumbled away.