Having to get married when I was sixteen.
The abuse and sexual assault.
The death of my father when I was a child.
The toxic relationships.
My uncle’s death.
The stress of a high-pressure HR job and conducting multiple layoffs in a short time. My past traumas unfold like a grim tapestry.
I only briefly touch on Timmy, though—just that I’m in a relationship that has involved some abuse. There’s too much else to cover, and I need them to understand the full context of my life before we get into the present.
By the end, I feel emotionally wrung out, but lighter.
Later in the day, Timmy corners me.
“I heard you talking about me during your therapy session,” he says, his face dark. “You really threw me under the bus.”
My stomach drops. “What?”
“I heard you. You were talking shit about me.”
I squint at him.What conversation washelistening to?
“I barely mentioned you, Timmy… I just provided a little context to help us figure this out,” I shrug. “But I spent most of the session talking about my life before I even met you. While a lot has taken place since we met, our relationship is a short snapshot in the span of my entire life.”
“Did you tell her you crashed the truck, too?”
“Yes, I did mention that situation,” I nod. “And why were you listening to my intake session?”
“I couldn’t help it,” he shrugs. “I was going to the bathroom and overheard some of it, and then I just stayed and listened for a bit. You made me sound bad.”
I’m stunned. My ex would never have done something like this. Therapy was sacred—private—and he’d go into another room with his headphones on. But Timmy doesn’t seem to understand—or care—about boundaries.
Later, he comes out of his own therapy session and he’s glowing. Beaming from ear to ear. “I love you so much,” he says, pulling me into a hug. “She thinks I’m doingreallygood. She thinkswe’redoingreallygood.”
LATER IN THE EVENING
Alice:
He spied on your therapy session? That’s wild. What a violation.
I hate him so much.
What would you tell your friend if she was going through this situation?
Me:
My hypothetical friend?
Alice:
Yeah.
Me:
I’d tell her to leave his stupid ass. She’s worth so much more.