If I’d thought ahead, I would’ve asked Eava for one before we left the kitchens. “That would be wonderful. Thank you.”
In a blink, she vanished.
I stared down at the little boy. Such a scowly little thing, just like his uncle. Perhaps he was Rían’s son and not Tadhg’s at all. I laughed to myself—it was either that or cry.
No, there was no denying whose son this was.
“Hello, Brogan. Do you remember me? I am your stepmother, Keelynn.” The boy quieted, peering up at me through glassy green eyes. I hated the word “stepmother” and everything it entailed. As if the distinction was another barrier between us. We already had so many of those.
His lower lip jutted out and began to wobble.
“Oh, please don’t cry. I’m sure this must be awful for you, and you must be missing your mother, but I am doing my best.”
A throat cleared from behind me. Millie waited in the doorway with a bottle clutched against her chest. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop.”
“It’s all right.” If she remained in this castle long enough, she would likely hear far worse than my pathetic confession. When I offered her the child, she made no move to take him from me.
“I hope ye don’t mind my asking,” she said, “but how long have ye had him?”
“Not even a week.” And yet, with the sleepless nights stretching into eternity, it felt like he’d been part of our lives for far longer.
“Here.” Millie pressed the warm glass bottle into my hand. “I think ye should be the one to feed him.”
“I don’t know how.” How mortifying to admit. I’d tried once, but he’d refused to take the bottle for me.
Millie gestured toward the wingback tucked beneath the window. “Sit down on that chair, and I’ll grab a pillow to tuck beneath your arm. He looks like a strong lad and will get heavy after a while.”
After a while? He was already heavy. I managed to sit without jostling Brogan too much. Millie stuffed a pillow beneath my arm where his head rested, taking away the child’s weight altogether. The moment the bottle’s teat met his little mouth, he sucked greedily.Just like your father.
I couldn’t help my smile.
Millie smiled down at us, and for the first time since Brogan arrived on our doorstep, I felt a little hope in my next breath.
“When he’s about halfway through that bottle,” she said, “I’ll teach ye how to wind him.”
I raised my eyes to hers. “Thank you.”
Her golden eyes softened as she sank onto the rug next to me and wrapped her arms around her knees. “I have a stepmother.”
“You do?”
She nodded. “Yes. And she loves us like we’re her own flesh and blood. That’s all ye really need to do, princess. Love the little lad and the rest will sort itself out.”
* * *
TADHG
“She’s going to leave me. Just you wait and see.” I could practically hear Keelynn’s footsteps as she walked out the door. See her silhouette fade into nothing. Feel my heart shattering into a million broken shards, slicing me from the inside out.
Ruairi shook his head, his eyes on the dark shadow spreading across the horizon. Not from the falling sun—no, that remained high in the sky. From that feckin’ blight. “Would ye blame her? Ye haven’t been sober since ye found out.”
The flask in my hand shook when I raised it to my lips. “This is the only thing that makes it better.”
His side-eye oozed judgement. “It’s making things worse.”
Who asked for his opinion, anyway? What did he know about love? Not a feckin’ thing. “Do me a favor and keep your thoughts to yourself.”
Fire ignited in his golden eyes, but like the friend he was, he let the subject drop. “Let’s go.”