My legs shook as I made my way to a heavily carved mahogany writing desk beneath a painting of what I assumed was one of Caiman’s ancestors.
Lowri watched with a furrowed brow as I searched the drawers for a fountain pen. Once I found one, I pulled a small card from a stack and wrote a note to Lady Whitney.
13
CAIMAN
Today had beenone of the best days of my life. Which was pathetic, really, since nothing had actually happened. It could’ve, though. If only Lowri hadn’t interrupted when she did. I traced a finger down my new silver scar, different from all the others on my hands.
Who was I kidding? It wasn’t Lowri’s fault. It was mine.
I was a coward.
Roisin had been so close, magic sparkling in her quicksilver eyes.So bloomin’ close. All I had to do was lean forward. Instead, I started wondering if I was misreading the situation. What if she hadn’t wanted me to kiss her? She could’ve closed the gap herself, and yet she hadn’t.
My father tossed and turned, the sheets twisting around his torso as he cried out in his dreams. No moonlight fell through the window, only darkness. My eyes had long since adjusted to the lack of light. I’d abandoned my coat and waistcoat ages ago, yet sweat still collected beneath my arms. My father’s teeth chattered despite the mound of fur blankets piled on top of him.
Today may have been the best day, but tonight felt like one of the worst nights. The sour smell of sickness clung to the heavy air.The royal physician had left an hour ago. On his way out, he had claimed the end was near. As much as I longed for the solace of sleep, I wanted to be with my father when he passed. No one should have to die alone.
Alrec had died alone, mortally wounded by cannon fire, tossed into the sea by a sinking ship.At least that’s what the eye-witness reports had said. I hoped he didn’t suffer. That he’d been gone before the waves had swallowed his body.
My mother had died alone as well.
Someone knocked softly at the door, and a woman popped her head inside. My heart beat double-time when I saw silver hair.
“You called for me, your highness?”
Not Roisin but her mother.
I stood and smoothed a hand down my breeches, trying to make it look like I was keeping it together instead of falling apart. “Come in. Please.”
She swept in as quiet as a breeze, glancing sidelong at my father when he whimpered.What must it be like for the fae, to not have to worry about something as final as death?
“The physician says there isn’t much time left,” I explained, fighting a losing battle with my tears.
Lady Seren’s mouth flattened, her expression grim.
“Would you be willing to check him? I know there isn’t much to be done, but if there is any way to ease his suffering, I would forever be in your debt.”
“Say no more.” She went to my father’s bed, drawing down the layers of quilts to reveal the white tunic swallowing his withered frame. After unlacing the front, she pressed her hands to his heart. When her eyes fell closed, I closed mine as well, praying to whoever would listen. If he was to go, let it be quickly and without pain. But if there was any way for him to stay . . . I knew how selfish it sounded, but I prayed for that most of all.
“Caiman?”
When I opened my eyes, I found my father sitting up, his back propped against the headboard. Was I dreaming? I must be. He hadn’t been lucid since the wedding.
“Thank you, Lady Seren.” My father patted her hand and gave her a wry smile.
She kissed his forehead, firelight glistening off the tears streaming down her cheeks. “My king.”
I rushed to his side and dropped onto the bed, taking his weathered hand in mine. “Father . . . you look . . .”
“Like a bloomin’ corpse,” he chuckled. When he squeezed my fingers, his grip felt as strong as ever.
He didn’t look like a corpse. The color had returned to his cheeks; the spark had returned to his eyes. “You look well.”
“What’d I teach you about lying, son?”
“You look better,” I amended. That last bit of magic had brought him back to me. How could Roisin think I found her magic disgusting? I had watched her heal broken men, had seen her mother heal my father. And she’d healed me as well, of my twisted leg and breathing troubles that had plagued me since birth.