The lady was in her solar, rolling bandages for the hospital. She also mixed medicinal salves according to her brother’s recipes. He ran the most prestigious apothecary in Peking. Indeed, Mama’s family had been associated with medicine and healing arts for generations.
Except for her mother, of course, who rolled bandages and mixed salves in her spare time because she was the wife of an important court official. And because the lady was squeamish when treating the ill. Whenever Ling Xin or her brothers had been ill, their nanny was the one who had tended them. At most, their mother would speak to them from the door rather than step inside the sickroom.
“Good morning mother,” Ling Xin said as she entered the solar.
“Good morning dear. Have you finished your dance practice already?”
Ling Xin sighed dramatically. “I fear I have been working too hard. My ankle hurts, so I decided to rest it today.”
“Wise of you,” her mother answered without looking up. “But what of your voice? I have not heard any singing. You must not lose the opportunity to learn from Li Fei. She has a beautiful singing style. And, you know, singing can be heard from a distance. If the emperor does not see you dance, perhaps he can hear you sing.”
“An excellent idea,” she said, though privately, she wondered if the emperor’s living space would be anywhere near the virgins who awaited his pleasure. If it was, then there would be dozens of virgins trying to sing for his attention.
But of course, she didn’t know if this was true. She didn’t know much of anything about what happened in the Forbidden City. And that was the whole problem.
“Mother, I have been thinking,” she said as she sat down and started rolling bandages.
The lady heaved a loud sigh. “And now you shall ask me something inappropriate.” The lady shook her head. “You cannot do such things in front of the emperor. No one wants to hear your bizarre thoughts.”
Ling Xin tried not to be hurt by that statement. On one hand, her mother had often admonished her for not thinking before acting. And now she was supposed to stop thinking? Or perhaps just stop sharing her thoughts, which was more likely.
But that did not stop her from carrying on with her questions.
“I am afraid you are correct, Mother,” she said, her tone a little harsh. “But I must ask someone for guidance, and my options are limited.”
“Guidance?” Her mother set down her finished bandage and looked at her. “On what topic?”
“You have set me the task of attracting the emperor—”
“And we are very proud of you for that,” her mother interrupted.
Ling Xin nodded, then decided to simply say it baldly. “I do not know how to attract a man.”
“You are kind, beautiful, and well versed in the Confucian virtues.”
“Just like every other girl there.” She touched her mother’s hand. “But I need to bemorethan every other girl there.”
“It is your beauty—”
“Every girl will be beautiful.”
“But you—”
“Mother!” she snapped, her impatience overcoming her good sense. “I need to know how to attract a man. Don’t pretend you don’t understand. I have heard uncle speaking of the prostitutes who come to the hospital—”
“Do not say those words!” her mother growled. “You should not even know about them. The emperor does not want such knowledge in a wife!”
Ling Xin grimaced. “Are you sure? What is his wife except a vehicle for his child? What are his concubines for, except for that?”
Mama sniffed with all the disdain it was possible to pour into a single inhale. Then she added, “He is the Son of Heaven. He will know your virtue, and he will select you.”
Ling Xin kept quiet, already familiar with the hard wall of her mother’s prudishness. But she had to know, and her mother was the only person she could ask.
“Very well,” she said, doing her best to appear meek. “Tell me about when you and father met. How is it that he chose you. Were you in love?”
“Love?” her mother scoffed. “That is something for fairy tales. You know better than to look for that.”
She did. After all, hadn’t that been Li Fei’s downfall? “I am not looking for love. I want to know why father selected you. What did you do to make him choose you?”