I like this.
I like us.
I’ve lived my life for sex. Sleeping with whoever, whenever, never wanting to get too close to someone… and then I met someone who lives life the same way, and for some reason, we didn’t want to live that life with each other.
I don’t know when things changed, but it was before that kiss.
At least for me.
“Avalon,” he groans as his pace picks up. I can’t read the look in his eyes, which haven’t left mine since we were in the living room. Part of me thinks he wants to kiss me again, but he got so used to that being off limits, so he doesn’t want to make the move.
So, I do.
I run my hands up his shoulders and around the back of his neck, my fingers creeping through his short curls before pulling his lips toward mine.
The kiss is the exact opposite of how his thrusts started. While those were delicate, the second my lips met his, he devoured them.
His hand drags up my waist before creeping up my arm, causing it to fall back to the bed with his as he interlaces our fingers. My other hand clutches his shoulder as he pushes deeper inside of me, every nerve in my body lighting up with arousal as he moans against my mouth.
Zeke’s lips leave mine, his teeth digging into my bottom lip, tugging it as he pulls back. Everything around us fades as the pleasure builds inside of me; my only focus is the smile forming on Zeke’s lips as he picks up his tempo. My eyes flutter shut, and my toes curl as the pleasure fills me. He captures my moan with a kiss as I fall apart, the sensation burning through my veins as he tips over the edge with me.
thirty-one
Zeke
Icould get used to this. I honestly don’t know why I fought it for so long. Sleeping around was fun, sure, but it was never fulfilling. I felt better during the sex, but after, I was right back to my reality.
The reality where my mom’s dying, and there’s nothing I can do about it. The reality where I’m preparing to lose the most important person in my life.
But then Avalon came crashing into it, and suddenly, I was okay with having this constant in my life, even if it wasn’t going to be something long-term. I just knew I liked being with her, even if it was only ever going to be sex. But it stopped being about sex a long time ago; I just think neither one of us was ready to admit it.
I always thought I’d be the one to break first. That one night, I’d tell her what was going on between us was deeper than sex and that she was becoming an important part of my life.
I’m not saying either of us is ready for theexclusivitytalk; we’ve been against relationships for so long that I don’t know if we’re prepared for a label. But I could get used to our new normal.
“What time do you need to leave tomorrow?” she mumbles, our bodies tangled together under her blankets, her finger drawing circles on my chest.
“My mom’s getting some test results at noon,” I reply. “So, I need to be there before then. Depending on the results, I might spend the night there. Sometimes, the hospital lets me do that.”
“You’re a good son, you know that?”
“She’s a good mom,” I argue. “I don’t know where I’d be without her; the least I can do is spend the next couple of days with her before I’m on the road.”
The truth is… I’m scared she won’t be here when I get back. Whenever we have to go away for a game, I prepare to get the phone call that she’s gone. And when it doesn’t come, I get a little relief until we’re on the road again.
“Where’d you go?” She touches my face. “I lost you there for a second.”
“Nowhere, sorry.”
“You’re worried every time you leave that it might be the last time you see her.” She frowns and I sigh, letting her know that she just read my mind. She’s gotten good at that. “I get it.”
“I know you do.”
It might not be because of the same thing, but I know she gets the fear. Avalon told me about the first time she got home from school and found her mom overdosing on the kitchen floor. She said every time she went to school after that, she’d prepare herself, like maybe she wouldn’t make it home in time like she did before.
I still see it in her eyes every time her phone rings, and it’s an unknown number. She waits for the call just like I do.
“Look at us.” She turns her head to gently kiss my bicep. “We’re quite the pair.”