I don’t know if I’ve ever seen Zeke’s eyes this soft… and I don’t know ifwe’veever had a moment this intimate. In what world does that make sense? We’ve been sleeping together for months, yet this is way more intimate than that.
I step forward, our now bodies pressed together, and I push up on my toes and kiss him.
It’s almost like his body doesn’t know how to react. I can’t remember the last time I was the one to initiate a kiss. Especially in a moment like this. One that’s electrically charged. Aside from the kiss before his banquet, he’s avoided kissing me because he knows I don’t like to kiss during sex, and he wants to respect that by not overdoing it in our day-to-day.
And I appreciate that.
But now I’m telling him I don’t care.
And I hope he gets that message.
His finger tucking under my chin, pulling me toward him while he pushes us back toward the wall, leads me to believe he does.
I don’t know why I’m surprised, though. Sometimes, I think Zeke knows me better than I know myself. Like he gets the thoughts in my head before I do.
His tongue finds its way into my mouth, dancing around with my own. This kiss is a mixture of emotions, but it makes sense when it comes to our relationship.
It’s soft, yet hungry. It’s romantic but full of lust.
And it has our first kiss beat in every regard.
He pulls back, and as he does, he pulls on my bottom lip with his teeth.
His chest rises and falls rapidly, his eyes burning into my soul as a small smile forms on his face. The kind of smile that saysI’ve been waiting for this moment… I was just waiting for you to want it.
And I do.
I pull my t-shirt over my head and then drop it on the floor. His eyes wander over my bare skin, just like they have many times before, but there’s something in his gaze that’s never been there.
His thumb brushes against my bottom lip before his lips meet mine again. This time, his hands are all over my body, as if he doesn’t want to leave any of my skin untouched.
He lifts me up, my legs quickly wrapping around his waist, my bare skin pressed against his, as he carries us into my bedroom.
His lips never leave mine. Not when he kicks the door closed behind us. Not when he lays me down on my bed. And not when he tugs my shorts over my hips and down my legs.
It’s as if he’s trying to make up for lost time. Trying to make up for the kisses we missed out on over the months.
And I love it.
He rests his forehead against mine, his eyes full of a fire I haven’t seen before. A look different than the lust and hunger his eyes usually hold during sex.
He presses his lips against mine, but this one is soft and gentle as if he’s cherishing the moment.
He reaches over me, opens the drawer of my nightstand, and grabs a condom. My room is so quiet that I hear him rip open the wrapper, the sound mixing with our heavy breathing.
We’ve had sex before. Many times, in fact, but this feels different. His hands shake as he pulls the condom out of the wrapper like this is the first time he’s ever done this. Like he’s nervous.
And my eyes study his every movement for the same reason.
I’m nervous.
That kiss opened a new avenue in our relationship, and I know he feels it, too.
Zeke positions himself over me, his eyes focused on mine as he sinks into me. I bite my lip, trying to keep my thoughts steady in this situation, even though my mind is running rampant.
Zeke grips my hips as he finds a steady rhythm to give us exactly what we need, but not a quick enough rhythm for us to finish too fast. Almost as if he wants to savor this moment, like maybe I’ll change my mind about him, and he wants to make sure he takes all of this in before I do.
But I don’t want to.