fifty-five
Avalon
Thank you all for coming.” Zeke’s the only one standing, everyone else is sitting around the fireplace we set up when we arrived. “Avalon had a great idea that I should get the people I love most, who I know my mom loved, and share stories about our time with her. I don’t know if any of you want to actually do that, but—”
“I’ll never forget the first time I came to your house,” Jaxon begins. “Your mom found out that my mom was a single mother and that I survived on peanut butter sandwiches because of her work schedule and what we could afford. That night, she sent me home leftovers, enough food for the week, and said you’d be too busy to eat them. She did that every week until we got on our feet.” Jaxon smiles. “The weeks your dad cooked were definitely better, but it’s the thought that counts.”
“That’s really sweet.” Brinley reaches out and grabs Jaxon’s hand. “I didn’t know that.”
“I’ll never forget your mom always asking me about Ember,” Cam adds. “Back when we were in middle school. Whenever we had a hockey game, she’d bring her kitchen sink cookies and make me bring them home to Ember.”
“Wait, she was the one who made those cookies?” Ember sits up, turning to Cam. “Why didn’t she say anything to me.”
“Mom’s brain wasn’t the best near the end; she might not have remembered,” Zeke replies.
“It was after you stopped coming to games. Elise wanted you to still feel included.”
The stories continue, and with each one, I feel more and more love for Elise. From the couple of months I knew her, I knew she was a special person with an amazing heart, but these stories prove that.
And the whole time, Zeke’s hand stays in mine. I hear an occasional sniffle, but unlike his previous ones, these were happy sniffles.
The doorbell rings, and Zeke wipes away the tears from his cheeks.
“That’s probably the food,” he says.
“I’ll help you grab it,” I volunteer.
“Me too.” Ember stands up, squeezing Declan’s shoulder before following us inside.
We grab the Chinese food from the delivery driver and begin to make our way back outside.
“Hey, Zeke,” Ember stops him, glancing outside, before looking back at him, “I just wanted you to know that Maia would’ve been here, but—”
“But Cam,” he stops her, “I get it.”
“No.” She shakes her head. “She couldn’t get off work. She was prepared to be here, regardless of Cam, because she cares about you. Even if your relationship did get off to a rocky start.” They laugh. “I just wanted you to know that.”
“Thanks, Ems.”
“Always.” Ember looks at me and then back to Zeke. “I’ll take this and meet you outside. Give you a second to talk.”
I roll my eyes as Ember walks back into the backyard.
“You have really great friends.” I follow Zeke into the kitchen.
“Yeah, I got lucky,” he responds. “Speaking of luck. Have you given any more thought to our conversation from earlier?”
“I don’t think I can be your friend, Zeke.”
“I understand,” he mumbles. “I don’t blame you—”
“Zeke,” I interrupt, “I want to be more. I don’t want us to jump around the subject, acting like we don’t feel how we feel, and try to play everything off like we’re just friends. We already did that. We already acted like what was happening between us was just sex, but it wasn’t, and if I’ve learned anything, it’s that time isn’t promised to anyone. And I don’t want to waste time acting like I don’t love you when I do.”
“You do?” he asks, almost surprised I could still love him after everything.
But truth be told, his mom dying is what happened. He said things he shouldn’t have, but he was in a really bad place. I’ve seen the things alcohol can make a person do firsthand, and if I could forgive my mom time and time again for doing much worse, it wouldn’t be fair for me to hold this against Zeke.
“Of course I do,” I respond. “I never sto—”