This time, he gulps, the cocky, playful Chase I’ve come to know… the dark, guarded man who has been trooping alongside me for days, casting jealous looks at our companion… suddenly missing as though my own boldness has flipped the switch on him.
Instead of him jumping at the chance to see me on my knees, he’s hesitating as he mutters softly, “I don’t know?—”
Maybe not. Or maybe he’s worried that I’ve lost my mind, or already aware that I’ll regret the offer come morning. But I’m not worried about the morning. I’m focused on taking care of Chase now, and if he needs me to be a little more obvious with what I’ve wanted to do since I accidentally found him leaning up against a tree, jerking off where no one was meant to see, I can do that.
I saw—and now Iwant.
In one quick motion, I shrug off Rory’s jacket so that I have full use of my arms before laying it gently on the dirt-covered ground just out of my reach. The same spare hair tie I’ve kept on my wrist since before the Turning is still there. I yank it off, gathering my hair together, throwing my messy curls up in a high pony.
And then, careful to meet his gaze so he can’t deny that I mean it, I say, “Ask yourself this, baby: would you rather party with your hand tonight or get your dick sucked by a Holden? Because that’s what I’m offering.”
Was it a mistake, saying the name? Considering the pained expression that flashes across his handsome features, maybe. “Look, I?—”
I hold up my hands, still standing instead of sinking down to the grass. “Hey. No pressure. But if this is about you cheating on the memory of my twin, I get it. It was just an offer. No hard feelings if you’re not interested.”
His Adam’s apple bobs, the way his jaw flexing telling me that heisinterested. That’s not the problem. Cheating on Hallie… I don’t think that’s an issue, either, considering he’s been, well,chasingme since I was let out of St. Matthew’s.
Oh, no. The problem is something I should’ve considered before he finally grates out, “Yeah, but if this is because of what happened back at East Jersey…”
Chase suddenly appears so wary, so torn, I feel like I need to do something,anything, to lighten the mood a little.
Shit. It’s because I said “repay”, isn’t it?
“Speaking of East Jersey… technically you’re my husband.” It’s a tease, but the words are too heavy for it to really be one. “Or you would’ve been if Maverick didn’t stop you before you finished… consummating the act. After all, Chase, you just stuck it in. You didn’t actually finish the other day. Neither of us did.”
Jesus fucking Christ. What the hell is wrong with me?
Even worse, he doesn’t seem to understand that itisa tease.
“Is that why you’re here tonight? Okay. Instead of you sucking my dick, Holden, we can try that again.” He shrugs, though it’s nowhere near as casual as he probably wishes it was. “If you’re willing, I’ll make you my wife. I’ll consummate that shit right now. Mrs. Knight… it has a nice ring to it, you think?”
My smile slides off of my face.
I was teasing. Chase? No matter how light he tried to make his tone, he wasn’t. After all, he wanted a bride. Hallie… Xandra… he just wants a Holden.
And here I am, growing wet at the idea of him having me flat on my back, his dick stretching me out, calling me his wife…
Fuck.
If I was smart, I’d laugh his comment off, then hightail it back to the campsite to leave Chase to handle his own erection. I could pretend I had to take a piss, then go back to watching over the fire until either Chase or Maverick and Veronica return, and it would be like this little detour never happened.
If I was smart…
Know what? I’ve never been that smart.
“I’m not going to fuck you tonight, Chase. But I’m going to take care of you.” His momentary disappointment turns to fleeting confusion… until I add, “Just like how you did to me in East Jersey.”
And, to remind him of my earlier offer, I dab my bottom lip with my tongue while reaching up behind me, tightening my ponytail.
He shakes his head, eyes going dark as he can’t help but remember what went down in that spare bedroom. “I won’t say that I didn’t enjoy tasting you, even though I know I should. But I had to, baby. What he expected from us… I didn’t want to hurt you.”
Oh, Chase.
“I know. And, I promise, you didn’t.”
“No,” he says, voice turning ragged as he reaches out, clutching my bare shoulder. His pinkie brushes my burn scar, and if it wasn’t anyone but Chase Knight, I’d be reaching for Rory’s jacket to shrug it on and cover up. But it is Chase, and I… I don’t want to hide from him anymore.
“Chase?”