I smile and lift the stuffed unicorn’s mouth to my ear before turning back to Grace. “He says he’s feeling more strawberry than lemon today.” I adjust the stuffed animal on my knee and give it a little bow. “And only if it comes with two sugar cubes and the biggest cookie on the plate.”
Ruby giggles and pretends to choose one of the imaginary cookies. “Only the best for Mr. Fluffles.”
The laughter bubbles up from somewhere deep inside me, real and warm, and for a moment, I let myself soak in the normalcy of it. The girls’ chatter. The smell of Mom’s cinnamon rolls drifting in from the kitchen where she’s cleaning up fromafter-school snacks. Outside, Dad is shoveling snow from the drive and whistling to himself.
This house wraps around me like a favorite sweater. Staying here has been the perfect distraction from the mess in my head. The mess of my life.
I tuck a curl of hair behind Grace’s ear as she starts serving her imaginary guests. I don’t want to think about the future right now, but I can’t stop my thoughts from swirling. What does my life look like as a single mom? How will I afford everything? What about my career and my entire world back in Denver?
I keep picturing myself on the sidelines of the field, the cheer squad behind me, the stadium roaring around me. Except I wasn’t there last night. I watched from the couch, holding my breath as always as the cheer squad nailed their routine, hating that I wasn’t with them. Wishing I had been. Then clutching the edges of my blanket and willing the Stormhawks to win, crying quietly when they did. Crying harder when I saw Chase, helmet under his arm, hugging Jake. Lying awake most of the night feeling more alone than I’ve ever felt in my life. Wishing I knew how to imagine a future that doesn’t have Chase in it.
“Would you like more tea, Auntie Rena?” Ruby asks, her big brown eyes blinking up at me.
“Yes, please,” I say, lifting my cup. She fills it with air, and we clink our cups gently together.
This. This should be enough. My parents. Elle. My nieces. Small-town vibes nestled in between the foothills of Clear Creek Canyon. The air filled with fresh snow and the smell of pine needles. But something still doesn’t feel right.
There’s a knock at the front door and then footsteps in the hall. A second later, my mom peeks into the room. Her high cheekbones and blonde hair make her a smaller, older mirror of me and Elle. “You have a visitor, Serena.”
I glance up, expecting Liv maybe, or Elle. But then Chase fills the doorway. The sight of him takes my breath away. He looks so damn good. Hulking frame taking up the doorway, deep brown eyes that find mine instantly, strong jaw clenched like he’s holding something back. His head is freshly shaved, and he’s wearing a tight black sweater that clings to his broad chest. I start to stand, but before I can even get my hands beneath me, Ruby and Grace squeal.
“Uncle Chase!” Ruby shouts. “We’re having a tea party! Can you join in, too?”
He smiles in a way that makes my knees feel weak, and I’m glad I’m sitting down already. Then he drops to the floor like it’s the most natural thing in the world, sliding into the spot beside me, displacing a teddy bear, which he dutifully props up in his lap. Our knees touch. Just barely. But it’s enough to send a jolt through me that leaves me reeling. My head might be trying to imagine a future where Chase isn’t mine, but my heart and body didn’t get the memo. Even through the deep ache of his rejection, all I want to do is lean into him.
“Congratulations on the win,” I say quietly.
“Thanks,” he replies, voice thick with something I can’t read. He opens his mouth to say something more, but Grace tugs on his sleeve.
“Do you want ice cream cake or chocolate cake?”
Chase pretends to consider it seriously as he stares at the empty plates. “It all depends. Has the ice cream melted?”
Grace giggles like he’s just told the funniest joke in the world and, for a strange few blissful minutes, we play pretend. He’s charming and patient and so good with them it makes my chest ache in a whole new way. How can he think he isn’t cut out to be a dad?
When the girls dart off to the kitchen to beg Grandma for the cinnamon buns, I turn to him, forcing my voice to stay steady. “What are you doing here, Chase?”
He looks down at the carpet, then back at me, deep eyes filled with apology. “I really fucked up, Serena. And I know I don’t deserve anything, but… I need you to come with me. I have something I’d really like to show you.”
I blink, take a breath. For weeks, all I wanted was for Chase to reply to my messages or call me on the phone, turn up at my apartment. And then he walked away when I told him about the pregnancy. When I needed him most. And now it’s not just me I have to think about. Not just my heart I need to protect.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I reply. “Maybe we could meet for coffee sometime next week and talk.”
Instead of arguing, he reaches into his back pocket. When he hands me what’s inside, I nearly laugh out loud. It’s a glittery card, the bright yellow faded with time. I recognize my nine-year-old handwriting, neat if not a little wobbly.
Happy Birthday Chase
I open the card and read the inscription.
Sorry I’m ill and can’t come to your party. This card gives Chase one special playdate with Serena. Whenever he wants.
The start of a smile tugs at my lips. “You kept this?”
“As if I could ever throw it away,” Chase says softly. “And I’m calling in my playdate.”
I stare at him. Uncertain. “What?”
He points to the card. “It says right there that you promise me a special playdate, and I’m calling it in.”