“Yeah, but she made a beeline for him after it all went down.The way they were all huddled talking…it was planned.”
“How was he with you?”Zenon asked, and I was pretty sure I saw him wince at having to ask.
“How was he?”I tapped my lips.“He was like he always is, a duplicitous liar.Pretending he’s all goodness and light, while doing his best to conceal the empty, cold vessel he is.He played the part of the loyal teammate all too well.He convinced me he was trying to make amends, then stabbed me in the back?—”
“Cold?Empty vessel?”Kryos said.“That’s what you get when you’re with him?”
“I’ve searched for more, believe me, but there is nothing there.”
“Urs, that doesn’t sound like Silas,” Chaos said.“Not at all.”
I planted my hands on my hips.“Are you saying I’m lying or that my powers are defective?”
He shook his head.“I’m saying, Silas has been a loyal brother to us.He protects and cares for our mates and children.He fights by our sides.Has he struggled without his wings and without a good portion of his power?Yeah, of course.But he wouldn’t just leave like that, not without telling us.”
Chaos leveled me with a look.“You two haven’t been on the best of terms the last few years.Maybe your judgment is?—”
“We made a truce,” I forced out, feeling like a fucking fool.“Until the tournament was over, I put aside my issues with him for the good of Hell.I took his back through every event.”And he’d taken mine, but it hadn’t been about me, it had been about knocking out the competitors and getting us to the final event so he could help the angels win.It had just been another way to get me to lower my guard and trust him so he could fuck me over.
“He’d been hoping to get you to forgive him,” Laz said.“Before he left, he admitted as much to us.”
“That may be so, but only so I’d lower my guard, so I’d be blind to what he had planned.Have you tried calling out to him?”I asked Zenon, since he’d always been the closest to Silas.
He nodded.
“And?”
“Nothing.”
“Because he doesn’t need you anymore.Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but the Silas you thought you knew was a fucking lie.He’s just been killing time here until his real brothers would take him back.”
“Maybe she’s right,” Lazarus said.
“We all know you and Silas have had issues over the years, Laz, but do you really think he was faking it?All this time here with us, protecting our females, doting on our kids, taking our backs night after night?You really believe that shit?”Roc said.
“I don’t want to, but what else am I supposed to believe?He’s not here.He’s ignoring Zen.”Laz shoved his fingers through his hair.“And though no one is saying it, he tapped out.He fucking surrendered when we could all see that he had Nathaniel.He would’ve won, they should have won, and right after he did that shit, he got his wings back.There’s no explaining that away.Those are facts.”
“I saw what you did, we all did, still not one part of me believes Silas would fuck everyone over and just leave like that,” Gun said.“He just wouldn’t.”
“He already did,” I said.“He sure as fuck isn’t here.”These males were good, loyal, they believed the best in those they trusted.It might be hard for them to get their heads around Silas’s duplicity, but they would when he didn’t come back or make any attempt to explain himself.
Chaos rubbed a hand over his shaved head.“Sorry for dragging you here, Urs.I guess we were hoping for some clarity, but I’m not sure we’re gonna get that without talking to Silas.”
They’d be waiting a long time.
I left a short time later and opened a gateway directly into my apartment in Hell.I didn’t want to see anyone, and as much as I loved my sisters, they’d want to talk it out, or murder someone.The former wasn’t something I could handle just then, and the latter was an impossibility since my target was hiding in Heaven like a fucking coward.
I strode up to the window and stared down at the burning river flowing below.A female Vysan swam leisurely past while her young jumped and splashed around her.Glittering rock shot up on one side of the river.It was covered in flame beetles, their little abdomens flickering like embers, making it look like a wall of fairy lights.Hell was dark in some places, especially here in Lucifer’s quadrant, but the light changed when night fell.There was no sun, but we had our own version of a sunset.The shadows deepened and the burning river glowed, causing oranges, reds, and yellows to dance high above the molten rapids, the light swirled and dipped around the outcroppings and jagged contours of the glossy onyx stone high above it, like our own Hellish version of the aurora borealis.
It was mesmerizing.Beautiful.And more than once, I’d imagined showing Silas the view from this window.Stupid, impossible.He was whole again, an angel with his wings and full power, which meant bringing him here wouldn’t be possible.Not that I wanted to anymore, right?Even thinking like this was masochistic.
I got Gunner’s confusion though.During our time in the tournament, I’d started to believe Silas actually cared, until I’d allowed myself to look more closely—and even seeing the cold void inside him, deep down I’d wondered if it was me, not him—that there was something wrong with me.Were my powers faulty, was I searching in the wrong place?Because how could a being look at someone the way he’d looked at me and it all be a lie?
Gods, the way he’d held me, touched me—kissed me.How could that all have been fake?
I shoved my fingers through my hair.Stop.
Where was he now?