I spun to him, surprised.“You might not have a choice.”
“If we can end this without murdering anyone, that would be my preference.My aim is to get the angels to surrender.”
What the hell was going on here?“How are you going to do that?Nathaniel would happily slice you open and watch you bleed out.He’d kill you in a heartbeat.”
“I’m not Nathaniel.”
I didn’t get it.Why the conscience all of a sudden?He may have an issue with killing those fucksticks, but I sure as hell didn’t, and I’d much prefer we were on the same page going into this fight.
We strode up to the huge opening that led out to the main arena.On the opposite side, Nathaniel and Eloa stood, their wings arching high over their shoulders, their swords already in their hands.
Silas stiffened beside me.
“What is it?”
“Check out the stands.”
Unlike last time, this crowd wasn’t some illusion.The knights were up there with their mates, the hounds as well.
“And there,” he said.
Lucifer sat surrounded by my sisters.
“They’ve brought everyone here that we love,” Silas said.
I looked up at him.“So it is possible, then?”The words fell from me before I could stop them.
“What?”he said, but was obviously distracted, still scanning the crowd.
This was the wrong time to bring this up, but I realized after this was over, whether we lived or died, this could be the last chance I had to talk to him about us.I didn’t want to die without being totally honest with him.It felt vitally important right then, no matter how much pain I might cause myself.“You know my specialty is poisons, but that’s not my only one.”
He turned back to me, his gaze searching mine.“I’m not sure what we’re talking about?”
“I can read other people’s emotions, Silas.I don’t do it often, I don’t like to pry into people’s shit, and honestly, most of the time I don’t want to know, but with you, I’ve looked…more than once.”
His stormy gaze seemed to swirl and darken, and he leaned closer.“And what did you see?”
“Like Nathaniel and Eloa, and every other angel I’ve encountered, nothing.You feel nothing, Silas.There is nothing inside you but an empty void.”
His head jerked back.“So that’s why you keep pulling away from me?”
“You have to see that allowing myself to fall for you would be a form of self-harm, even someone as messed up as me has no desire to do that.”
He hissed out a breath and grabbed my wrist, tugging me closer.“I assure you, Ursula, I can fucking feel.”
I shook my head.“I don’t believe you, but that’s okay.I don’t know how this fight will go, but I wanted you to know before we walk out there that you don’t have to pretend with me, not anymore.”
“You think I’m pretending?”His body went rigid.He still had his fingers curled around my wrist, and he lifted my hand, pressing it to his chest.“Trust me, the emotions are there.”
He was lying.He had to be.“Okay, then what are you feeling right now?”
His eyes narrowed.“If you don’t know by now, Urs, I doubt you ever will.It’s obvious I’ve been wasting my time here.”
It was my turn to jerk back.“Silas?—”
He strode out, and I had no choice but to follow him.
The crowd went wild when we entered the arena, and I shoved down the doubts now swirling around inside my head.I turned in a slow circle, taking it all in.The knights, the hellhounds, Lucifer and my sisters were on one side, surrounded by a lot of people I’d never seen before.The other side had several rows filled with angels.