“What makes you think that I am?” I ask, pulling out the chair opposite him and sitting down. “He lied to me, and he hurt me. He’s probably sleeping with that redheaded woman at the clubhouse.” I say the words, but I don’t believe them.
In fact, he messages me every night, letting me know what he’s up to.
“No, he’s not. You know that he wasn’t even going to sleep with her in the first place, even though that’s what he used to do. He’d already told her no, then called her back when he wanted to make you leave. I think you should put him out of his misery.”
Cash didn’t know what was going to go down, so all of his reactions were genuine. He was loyal to me when he had every reason not to be, going against his own father. He’s growing into an amazing man. When I asked him if he got into trouble for doing that, he said no, that Chance told him he was proud of him.
“You believe him?”
He nods his head. “Yes, I do. And you know I would be honest with you. He loves you, Kenzie. I’ve never seen him like this, ever. In fact, it’s kind of pathetic. He’s losing aura, if you know what I mean.”
I don’t, but I’ve heard the teens at school say that.
Wrapping my arms around myself, I consider Cash’s words. When I get back up and look out the window again, Chance is still sitting there, his head in his hands.
I feel bad for a moment, but then I remember what he did.
He’s the one who ruined us.
He’s right about one thing, though. I wouldn’t have wanted to leave. I would have wanted to stay with him. But surely, there could have been another way than for him to have me see him like that.
And now that woman, Red, is a new club girl, and I’d have to be around her if I went back to the clubhouse. The thought makes me feel sick.
Cash comes up behind me and presses a kiss to my cheek. “Go and talk to him. It doesn’t make you any less of a badass, strong, independent woman if you want to forgive him, you know.”
“I know,” I whisper.
Chance’s head lifts when he hears the door opening, and his eyes follow me as I come and sit next to him on the porch. “More sunflowers?”
“They are your favorite. You said they make you happy,” he rasps in that low growl of his.
“They do.”
He smiles, and I can feel his gaze on my profile. “Cash is watching us through the window.”
“He’s the one who gave me the pep talk to come out here,” I admit, and he laughs.
“I knew I loved that boy.”
Taking him in, I notice how tired his ocean-blue eyes are. He still hasn’t shaved, but I find the beard pretty fucking sexy on him. His dark hair is now curling behind his ears.
“I don’t fully trust you.”
“I know, but I’ll prove to you that you can,” he vows, cupping my face in his hands. “I can’t eat, I can’t sleep. And when I do, I dream about you. I love you, Kenzie, and I’ve never said that to another woman before. If you want me to step away from the club to be with you, to prove to you?—”
“I don’t want you to step away from your family, Chance. They are a part of you.”
“Yeah, but nothing means anything without you there,” he admits, a hint of vulnerability in his tone. “If you want me to walk away, I will. Lust can take over as president.”
I can’t picture Lust, the least serious man in the MC, as president, but I guess he became VP for a reason.
“No, being a Bastard is a part of you.” I smirk.
The whole MC would come for me if I took him away, and I don’t want him to stop being who he is.
Well, besides the manwhore part.
And if I’m being honest, I love being a part of his MC world. I adore his brothers, and even the club girls have grown on me.