“I’ve used the treadmill with one hand before.But I need help with my shoelaces.”
Arne jumped into the kitchen.“I can help!I learned how.Some of the kids in my class have Velcro shoes, but I can tie up laces.I can tie up my soccer shoes.”
I smirked at Justin.“I guess your shoes are covered.”
Justin went upstairs to change.I did not offer assistance, and fortunately my son didn’t either.Justin came back down in sock feet, carrying running shoes.I recognized the make and had seen an advertisement for the brand with Justin and his teammate Cooper.Not that I looked for reminders of him, but he was news here.
Justin sat on the bottom step and Arne rushed over to help.Justin’s legs were muscled, more than I remembered… I closed my eyes.Not appropriate, Mia.
It turned out that Arne was good at tying up his own laces, but not as good at tying up someone else’s.He tried several times, getting frustrated.
“Hey.”My son looked at me.“You can practice on your own shoes, doing them from the other side.But right now Justin needs to get going, so how about I finish up?”His lower lip started to show.“Then you can tie my shoes for me.”
A long sigh.“Okay.But I’ll do it next time, Mr.Justin, don’t worry.”
Justin shot me a glance.Arne was pretty determined for a six-year-old, so he’d soon get the hang of it, even if there wasn’t a next time with Justin.
I squatted down at Justin’s feet and focused on his shoes.His legs were spread apart on the low step.I did my best to ignore the fact that I was almost face-to-face with his dick, a position I’d been in before for very different reasons.I tied the shoes up quickly and got back to my feet, blaming my flushed cheeks on that.
“Thank you,” Justin said but didn’t look up.
“I’m going to go with you—it’s my job.”
He rolled his eyes.“Did you want Arne to come with us?”
Arne would talk to Justin the whole time, and I wasn’t sure that was going to help him work out.And working out might bring up the idea of hockey again, and I would really like to avoid that.But Arne pleaded with his eyes.
“Finish your book first, and then you can come down.”Justin didn’t know how chatty Arne could get, so I’d spare him.Tomorrow he should be back in class, and it would just be Justin and me.
Huh.Just the two of us might be awkward.Arne was a buffer today.
Justin led the way down the stairs.The place hadn’t been updated in at least twenty years.Maybe more.Certainly not since I’d been here last.There was fake wooden paneling on the walls and a ratty carpet on the floor.The couch was lumpy but comfortable, at least it had been eleven years ago.I forced back memories of making out there.There was the old TV, a big built-in with a stereo.Justin’s grandparents had inherited it from their parents, and for all I knew it still worked.
Past the family room was the laundry room, an unfinished space covering half the footprint of the house.There was a new treadmill there and a familiar set of weights.Back in high school, I’d hung out while Justin worked out.And after…
Nope.That was the past.No point in dwelling on it, especially not with Justin right here.He stepped on the treadmill and punched in a program with his left hand.The machine started up slowly, so he wasn’t rushing into something.It was almost like he knew what he was doing.I rolled my eyes internally.I didn’t need to hover.At this walking pace there was no risk, so I wandered around, looking at things familiar and new.There was a large pile of boxes in the corner.Justin’s and Jess’s names were written on them.
“Your grandmother packed up your stuff?”
He glanced over.“Yeah.Jess said Grandma got everything organized when she knew she’d have to go to a care facility.She didn’t want to throw anything out in case we might want it.We were supposed to go through this stuff when we had time.”
And Justin hadn’t been back.Jess hadn’t gone through the boxes either.
My fingers were itching to check them out.Were there things in there from when Justin and I dated?We went out for most of three years.We’d had a lot of mementos.Or had he gotten rid of everything when we broke up?I’d thrown away a lot of stuff.But some I hadn’t been able to.I’d shoved everything into a box, hidden in the back of the closet, unwilling to torment myself with what-ifs but unable to deny that those things had meaning.
“I should go through those boxes while I’m here.Jess can do her own, but I don’t want to give her more things to deal with.”
Justin had always been protective of his twin.I’d thought it showed admirable character, until when it came down to a choice between family or girlfriend, family won.I quashed the ungenerous thought.I’d made the same choice between Justin and my family.It would be hypocritical to blame him for doing what I’d done.Eleven years ago, I’d expressed my thoughts at full volume in that last argument that broke us up.
I shook my head.Time to move on.“Are you safe to open these with your left hand?”After seeing what he’d done to himself with a bread knife, I was skeptical about how he’d handle a box knife or scissors.
Justin peered at them, still walking at a reasonable pace.“Probably not.”
“I can do that for you, whenever you want.”
“Now?”
“Sure.”There was a workbench at the end of the room.Probably the best place to find something to slit open the tape.It had belonged to his grandfather, someone I’d never known.He’d passed about a year before I met Justin.I checked out the bench.Everything here was just as packed up, except for a few everyday tools.