“Spoken like someone who’s never been married.” When I didn’t crack so much as a smile, Mike gave me a hard nudge. “What’s with you? You finally make a move on Bluebird and he turn you down?”
“Not quite.” I tossed my empty coffee cup into a nearby recycling bin. “He kissed me.”
Mike’s jaw dropped, and a whole lotta nothin’ came out.
“Yeah. That was my reaction too.”
“Holy shit, Ollie. We should be poppin’ some champagne or getting chocolate wasted.” Mike began to break it down, throwing off some shoulder rolls while he snapped along to whatever beat was in that thick head of his. “Come on, don’t make me celebrate by myself.” When I didn’t join in, he stopped dancing and rolled his eyes. “Dude, what’s the problem?”
“What’s the problem? That should be obvious.”
“Uh…” He waved his hand for me to elaborate.
“He’s not gay. He’s confused. And he shouldn’t be kissing me.”
Mike stood there blinking at me. “You’re joking. Tell me you’re about to psych me out and that you didn’t push him away or something stupid.”
“You wouldn’t understand,” I said, walking off.
“Oh my God. Oh my Goood.” Mike groaned. “Tell me you didn’t.”
“I told you that you wouldn’t understand.”
“I’m sorry, but I’m gonna need you to come back here and repeat all that in my good ear. ’Cause I thought I heard you say the guy you’ve been crushing on forever kissed you and youpushed him away, but that can’t be right, because you’re not a dumbass.”
“I did say that.”
“I changed my mind, then. You are a dumbass.”
“Mike, gimme a break here?—”
“Give you a break? What the fuck, man? What’s wrong with you?”
“I don’t know.” Too restless to stand there arguing, I began to pace. “He doesn’t know what he’s doing.”
“The fuck he doesn’t.”
“Reid’s still trying to figure out who he is, and all I’m doing is making things more confusing for him.”
“Oh, right. You want him. He wants you. It can never happen.” Mike slapped his forehead. “Wait, no, that’s not how it goes.”
“You’re supposed to be seeing my side.”
“The ‘I’m a fucking moron’ side?”
“The ‘I’m somehow taking advantage of him’ side.”
“Please remind me how it’s taking advantage when he’s the one who kissed you.”
“Have you forgotten he suffered a major brain trauma?”
“Uh, no. I was there.”
“Then you’d know how something like that can change a person.”
“And what if this is who he is now?” When my mouth opened and shut without a comeback, Mike nodded. “Yeah. What then?”
I wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction of being even a little bit right, so I ignored him and kept right on walking.