I know that, of course, but my parents didn’t. They just don’t care.
As I head down to the front of the building to wait for P’Wisit, I think about everything Pah said, my heart swelling with love for him even more. For the millionth time, I wish that he were my real father, Mae my real mother, and Ten my real brother.
But that would make Sud your real brother, and would you really like that?
P’Wisit pulls up to the curb in his pale blue Toyota Alphard. I appreciate the fact that, even though his family is wealthy, he drives a relatively understated car. I don’t like show-offs. My parents tried to buy me a flashy car before I left for university, but I refused it, which is why Sud drives me around or I catch the BTS or a motosai. I don’t want to feel indebted to the people who call themselves my parents but have never earned the title.
When we’re both in the car, P’Wisit looks me over.
“You look nice in black, Nong. It emphasizes your pale skin,” he says.
My face heats with a blush. “Thank you, P’. You look nice, too.” He’s wearing a colorful shirt hanging open over a blue T-shirt and a nice pair of khaki pants. A thick gold necklace rests around his neck. His dark hair is slicked back, and he looks undeniably handsome.
“P, may I ask where you got the necklace you’re wearing? I’ve noticed it before and admire it.”
“Oh.” P’Wisit touches the chain with his fingers as though he forgot it was there. “An ex-girlfriend bought it for me a few years ago. I would have given it back, but we broke up amicably and are still friends. You like it, huh?”
“Yes. It…looks good on you.” I blush harder and tell myself to shut up before he gets the wrong idea. I’m so bad at small talk. Why this popular guy wants to hang around with me, I have no idea.
The movie theater is crowded, and P’Wisit takes my hand as we move through the congregation of people in the lobby. SinceI have no desire to be left alone among this many people, I don’t pull away. P’Wisit buys popcorn, and we squabble about who’s going to pay before I finally give in. I allow P’Wisit to take my hand again and navigate us toward the correct theater.
When someone calls my name, I raise my head and look around, and P’Wisit stops.
It’s one of Sud’s roommates, Tao. A pretty girl is with him, and their hands are clasped like mine and P’Wisit’s are. I have the sudden urge to jerk my hand away, but that would be rude to P’Wisit. Instead, I move a little closer to him, attempting to block Tao’s view of our entwined hands with my body.
“I thought that was you,” Tao says, smiling at me before giving P’Wisit a curious look. “This is my girlfriend, Jia.”
“‘Wa’dee, Tao-khap,” I say, using the excuse of giving the wai to slip my hand out of P’Wisit’s grasp.
I introduce him to them, although I have a feeling both Tao and Jia already know who he is. I can tell Tao’s curious as to why I would be at the movies with such a popular senior of ours.
Since we’ve stopped in the middle of the long hall lined with theaters, people are having a difficult time getting around the four of us, so we say our goodbyes and continue on. Tao and Jia go into a different theater as P’Wisit and I continue down the hall. This time, I keep my hands in the pockets of my light jacket and stay close to him. Inside the darkened auditorium, the movie is just starting.
Instinctively, I know that P’Wisit will broach the subject of our relationship tonight. It won’t happen until after the movie, though, so I make an effort to relax as P’Wisit finds us two seats together and we settle in, sharing the tub of popcorn.
The film is a comedy, and I’m soon tugged into the plot. Something about the tongue-in-cheek style of humor tickles my funny bone, and I laugh more than I ever remember laughing at a movie before. A couple of times, I turn to P’Wisit to saysomething, thinking that it’s Sud by my side, and have to cover the move by getting more popcorn. I get the feeling that P’Wisit wants to hold my hand, and I keep mine tucked between my thighs. Sud was right—I am naïve. It’s so obvious now that P’Wisitlikesme, likes me, that I don’t know how I didn’t see it before. By the time the movie’s over, I’ve worked myself into a state of anxiety, but P’Wisit talks about the funniest parts of the show, and, before long, I’m comfortable with him again.
Outside, the night is warm and humid. We stroll a couple of blocks, still talking about the movie, and then P’Wisit leads me to a bench at the edge of a park.
“Mee Noi, you’ve probably figured out that I like you,” he says after a moment.
Although I’ve been expecting this, I’m tongue-tied.
He watches me with expectant eyes while my heartbeat escalates.
“Um, I wasn’t sure, actually,” I say when I finally find my voice.
P’Wisit smiles. He really is handsome, but, in my mind, his nearly perfect features are no competition to Sud’s sleepy-eyed, rough-and-tumble good looks.
“Does it bother you?” he asks.
“No! No, of course not. I’m flattered that you notice me at all.”
P’Wisit lets out a short, disbelieving laugh. “I’ve never met anyone like you. So self-deprecating. Of course I notice you.” He shakes his head, smiling at me again. “Nong.” He reaches for my hand, warm fingers curling around mine. “I want you to be my boyfriend.”
My breath catches in my throat. The moment is surreal. Someone wants to be my boyfriend. The idea is both exciting and terrifying. I can’t imagine being close to P’Wisit like boyfriends.Kissinghim. I’m sure he would be very nice to kiss, but I barelyknow him! And what about Sud? The longer I don’t say anything, the dimmer P’Wisit’s smile becomes until it’s completely gone.
“There’s someone else you like, isn’t there?” he says.