But, finally,he pulls back.
His brows draw together and his mouth is parted. His chest heaves.
“Arlet,” he groans. “Forgive me.”
“I can’t,” I bite out. “Because you did nothing wrong.”
He looks at me like a lost man. If he could, I don’t doubt he would’ve tried to bolt. To run far from both this place and me.
But he can’t. We have to stay here.
I sit there, waiting to see what would happen next. Would he try to kiss me again? Or skulk away to the fire?
His throat bobs.
“You need to sleep, Arlet. We both do. We’re just tired,” he chokes out.
I nod my head, then glance back at the bed. “Would you?—”
“I’ll be more attentive this time. I’ll wake if you turn again,” he says quickly. “No need for the bindings.”
Accepting his answer, I dip my head once more, and push towards the bed. I slide under the blanket, and close my eyes.
My mind stays totally awake for hours.
Chapter 28
VANN
The night drags on, and sleep evades me.
I roll onto my side, blinking against the dim firelight. I let myself look up at the bed, and there she is.Arlet.
Her breathing is soft and steady, and her lips are slightly parted in sleep. A strand of her copper-red hair has fallen across her cheek. The memory of the warmth of her skin lingers on my fingertips.
We’d almost kissed last night.
And she rejected me.
It fucking hurt.
It hurts almost as much as my stupid lie, and I worry I made a mistake.
Love is vast, like the ocean. It has unknown depths. It gives and takes, ebbs and flows.
Was my maintained loyalty to Adra just a way to staunch the flow of the waves? Am I… a fool seeking to hold back something as mighty as the sea?
The woman before me is just starting to find herself. Even without a heart, plagued by the constant pain, I have warmed to her.
She makes me feel like I am alive. Like it is all right to be happy again.
Perhaps it is time to lay to rest the ghost of what once was, and let theearth cradle the remnants of your past, a voice whispers.It is not too late to tell the truth.
I grit my teeth, frustrated and pull out the small pad and charcoal. It takes time to flip past the endless drawings of her. Lying in bed beside me, walking through the mountain pass, her hair tearing free of her bun on the dragon to whip over my skin.
Now, I capture this moment. Letting the brush of my hand craft another memory. Trying to get this all right because it was possible that one day, we would return to Enduvida, and everything would sink into the dull patterns we’d followed before.
Another ache blossoms in my chest. I will miss the constant companionship if that happens.