I can’t find it in myself to figure out why it took so long. I’m going to her side, and I will never leave.
I’m coming,Ruh’flor.
Chapter 24
MELISA
Ipull off my nightgown and use it to staunch the wound on my arm as I look for another dress to wear to meet Ra'Sa. Judging by the moon’s course in the sky, he might already be waiting for me. The smell of blood fills my nose, giving me a light headache.
At least the gash on my ribs doesn’t hurt so much.
Estela once told me elm tree sap can help with wound healing. There’s one near my room. At the very least, I imagine it should help stave off infection.
Reaching for a chilled bucket of water, I wash my skin and then pull on a new dress. My body warms in mere moments, and I am grateful for the change of temperature.
As I walk out of the house, I continue to think of Estela. She'd shown me friendship when I let very few see me. Not Hibsej, not most of the other comfort women. She was like Seranya, in that regard.
The memories of two women, both important to me for very different reasons, comfort me as I cross the backyard. Pausing at the start of the trees, the deep night presses against my skin andthe backs of my eyelids as I sigh. Then I push deeper, looking for the tree.
Its silver and brown stripes stand out against the pines. Pockets of sap are scattered up and down the trunk, and I pop a few, coating my fingers in the sticky substance while holding up my arm to inspect the wound. In the dim light, I see some of the blood has started to clot, but the wound is hot and tender.
I hiss as I smear the sap over it.
A branch cracks from behind the tree. Out steps Ra'Sa. A light flickers dimly in the center of his chest, almost like the flicker of a pixie.
“You’re hurt again,” Ra’Sa says.
His Fuegorra mixes with the moonlight, illuminating his features. Harsh lines bracket his mouth and tense between his eyebrows. He looks like he would burn down the entire forest.
But those eyes are blue, like the open skies. Panic flares up inside me, compounded by my shitty night.
"What the hell are you doing? Where’s your glamour?”
“Midnight passed—don’t worry, no one will find us. Now tell me what happened?" he demands, pulling me into the shadows of the trees.
We walk away from the cabin, away from the slave pens, until I can’t see any signs of Zlosa. Ra’Sa presses himself against a rough tree trunk, encasing me with his body as he looks at the wound. The gem in his chest glows brighter.
I panic more, placing my other hand over the glow, trying to hide it.
"Let me go, and turn that off," I whisper.
His head snaps up, but his fingers continue to gently cradle my injured arm. Blood weeps from the slash, staining his blue skin.
“Did Eneko do this?”
My anger fades at the look in his eye. It's too intense, too consuming. I spent my time with Eneko wishing he were Ra’Sa and now… now I'm here.
Heart galloping, arm stinging, and lungs constricting. I'd rather be anywhere else than seeing his face when he realizes where I've been.
“No. It's payment to his wife," I say softly.
His eyebrows draw together. "What does that mean?"
I worry my lower lip. If I tell him, he will be disgusted. Disappointed. He might even leave. Men only defend that which they think they’ve conquered. It's just how they are—territorial, cruel, jealous.
That’s why heroes are dangerous. They deluded themselves into believing such behavior is honorable because they are the ones doing it.
My actions are not noble. They rarely have been. Even when I longed for the Enduar before me, it was out of selfishness, not love. I doubt I can even love like a proper person.