She was bearing her heart and soul to him. Hoping. Wishing he didn’t crush it. It was a risk telling him all this, but without risk, there was no reward. Her father had taught her that.
By the look of sadness in Alex’s eyes, she could see he’d already made up his mind about them, and it wasn’t looking good.
“Payton, I care about you. I always have. I pushed you away when we were teenagers because what I felt for you was anything but brotherly. The past few days…” A look of euphoria came over his face, and Payton swore she saw heaven. “Words can’t describe what the past few day with you have been.”
“Good? Bad? Unremarkable?” she suggested.
“Heaven.”
The same as her. “Then why are you trying to deny us?”
Alex stood up and started pacing. She immediately missed the heat of his hand. “Because we live two very different lives. I have my career, and you have yours. I can’t ask you to give that up for me. Everything you have is here.”
Silly man. “I can have everything with you.” That stopped him in his tracks. “I love my job, but it’s a job. It’s not my life. I can do it anywhere. I’m pretty sure there’s crime in Texas.”
Instead of looking happy about her statement, his features pinched as if in pain. “You shouldn’t have to make that sacrifice for me.”
Payton tapped her finger over her lip in thought. “Give up long lonely nights at a desk for the man I love snuggled in our bed. Yes, it sounds like a horrible trade off.” She gave him a side look, daring him to contradict her. While he didn’t say anything, didn’t look convinced yet.
“And what about my schedule? I’m gone more than I’m home. I work crazy hours. I—”
“Alex,” Payton cut him off before he could spew any more negative nonsense. It wasn’t anything she hadn’t thought herself. “You forget I was raised by an army man. I know the sacrifices, but the good outweighs all that.” Alex stared, not getting her meaning. “You, you will outweigh all of that. I know when you are home, you’ll be attentive and make me forget about all the time we spent apart and make up for it.” Her voice turned deep and husky, letting him know her meaning.
She finally understood why her mother stuck around and never divorced dad. As often as he was gone and forgetful, mom loved him and treasured all the time they got to spend together.
She wanted that with Alex. Payton was willing to wait the weeks or months for Alex to come back from missions. He was worth the time apart because she knew he’d make her the center of his universe when he was home.
Even across the room, she could see his pupils dilate. Then he was moving, like a flash. One moment far away, the next in front of her. Careful of her shoulder, her grabbed her face and sat her up, bringing her to his lips. It was far from a chaste kiss. All the passion and love between them burst forth like fireworks on the 4thof July.
His tongue thrust into her mouth, tangling with hers. Dominating. Taking what he wanted. She was all too happy to give. She clung to him with one hand, riding the storm with him. After a few minutes, he finally pulled back but didn’t separate from her. Resting his head against her.
“God, I love you. I love you so much. I can’t think of a time that I didn’t love you.”
Payton’s chest was near to bursting. She thought she would never hear those words from him. “I love you, and I can’t wait to show you how much when I finally get out here.” And could move her shoulder without it pinching. Stupid bullet wound. Simon would definitely pay for this.
Alex pulled back. His face was so expressive and filled with so much love. “Will you come to Texas with me?”
“As if you have to ask,” she said in a teasing tone, though her stomach was doing somersaults. She couldn’t wait for them to start their life together. She had a few things to wrap up around here. Good thing her lease was almost up on her apartment. “You can’t get rid of me now, bud.”
Alex smirked before a shadow passed across his face.
“What is it?”
“I don’t want to leave, but—”
“Go,” she chuckled shooing him off, knowing what he was trying to say. “I know you want to interrogate Simon.” She was sure her dad was climbing the walls waiting for Alex to come out so they could go. “Just do me a favor and get a few cheap shots in for me.”
“I can swing it.” He leaned down and kissed her again, though this was chaste compared to the last kiss. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
“I’ll be here.” The hospital wouldn’t let her leave for another day. That didn’t mean she couldn’t start working on her moving plans. She should be at least a little nervous about moving to another state and starting over, but with Alex she wasn’t. She was actually excited for the next chapter in her life. Payton had a feeling her dad knew what was coming next, so telling him wouldn’t be bad. “Now go before my dad grows impatient and leaves without you.”
He gave her one last peck then left. Payton fell back against her pillow with a content sigh. Who knew her life would change so dramatically in the span of a week? She’d gone from thinking the man she loved, hated her to in fact knowing he did love her. Her dad hadn’t been kidnapped but allowed himself to be captured, and now she was moving.
Speaking of moving, she couldn’t just lay in bed; she needed to get a move on making arrangements. She had some apartment hunting to do too. She loved Alex, but she didn’t think they were ready to be living together quite yet.
Chapter 36
“Well, this isn’t good,” Alex said standing next to Nick and Colin in the holding cell with Simon Diesel. A very dead Simon Diesel. The man’s throat had been slit.