But I still haven’t heard a peep from him, and every time I call, it goes directly to voicemail. I consider asking Cammy for her phone so I can call him, but I don’t want to be weird about this, and like I said, I don’t want her to panic.
And honestly, I don’t want to talk about what this could mean.
My chest aches, and I feel like I’m going to throw up. I’m worried about him and if something is wrong, but I’m also hurt.Why isn’t he talking to me? What did I do to make him not want to talk to me?
I can only assume he’s mad at me for something. There’s no way he’s still sleeping, late in the afternoon. He has to be at work.
Maybe seeing the shit my family comes with is too much. Maybe Chrissy is too much. And in that case, fuck him.
It still hurts though. It really does. Because I gave into him, trusted him, accepted that we could be together and things could work out. I let him into this house, brought him into my sisters’ lives.
And now look at me…
Cammy’s full attention is on Chrissy, which I am thankful for because I’m only half here.
“Is that okay, Cass?”
“Huh? Yeah, cool.”
I see the weird looks they’re giving me, but they don’t say anything. They shut the TV off and go into their rooms.
I stare at the black screen, trying to figure out what the hell they said. We were sitting here together watching Supernatural, and then they both leave to go in their rooms?
I get up and knock on Cammy’s door.
She opens it, her brow raised.
“What’s going on?” I ask.
“You agreed, Cass.”
“Cammy…”
“Look, I know you’re stressed out about whatever is going on, but you can’t walk around like a zombie for the rest of your life. If you’re mad that he isn’t answering you, do something about it.”
“What am I supposed to do?” I hiss. “I’m calling him. Texting him.”
“Hmm…” She taps her chin. “You have a car, Cass. Maybegoto him.”
“No, I can’t—”
“And why not? You know where he lives.”
“He isn’t home right now. He’s at the office and there’s no way—”
“Well, it’s a good thing you told Chrissy we could go out for lunch and to the movies. By the time we’re done with that, he’ll be home.”
Oh… is that what I agreed to?
“Okay, you’re right. I’m going to change.”
Cammy smiles cockily and closes the door. By the time I get out of my room, they’re waiting for me.
We go to lunch and the movies. I remember bits and pieces of it, but barely anything. When we get home, the girls get out of the car. Chrissy hurries up the steps and lets herself in. Cammy ducks her head back in the door, giving me a stern look.
“Are you going?” she asks.
“Yes.”