God yes. Someone besides Hayden’s dreary face would be lovely. “Only if you bring Avery with you,” I joke.
“Will you ever want to spend time with only me ever again?” she asks with a faux annoyed tone.
“Nope. Avery is the light of my life now.”
“Our friendship was nice while it lasted. I’ll see you soon.”
Hanging up, I toss the phone on the bed. “Harper is on her way.”
I shuffle off the bed and rise to my feet. I brush past Hayden to go to the bathroom—I don’t need to go, I just need to get away from him for a moment. Placing a hand on my shoulder, he stops me. “Alyssa, we need to talk.”
I step away and his hand drops. What more can he say? I know how he feels. This time when I walk away, he doesn’t stop me.
In the bathroom, I close the door and lock it behind me. Leaning my head back, tears trickle down my cheeks. A few weeks ago, I knew exactly what I wanted for my life. It took one fall on a stormy night to change everything, making me question if I’m on the right path. One that includes raising a baby. If I take this new direction, will I be travelling on this path alone?
“I didn’t think Hayden was going to let you leave the house,” Harper says.
I roll my eyes. “He’s watching over me like a mother elephant. If I move, he thinks I’m going to break.”
“That’s sweet. He’s making sure you’re resting.” Harper adjusts the muslin wrap covering the baby stroller from theafternoon sun as we wander around the park. My ankle is protesting slightly, but I’m not giving up this time away from the house for anything.
“I’m so sick of that bedroom. Sick of sleeping. Sick of feeling like an invalid.” Spotting a park bench, I walk to it and sit down. My ankle isn’t as strong as I’d hoped. “I’m staying here and never going back,” I say like an insolent child.
“If you’re not home in an hour, he’s going to send a search-and-rescue team out to find you and drag you back.”
I shrug. “He can try.” I’ll kick and scream before I let that happen.
“What’s going on with the two of you? I know you said things weren’t working out, but when I see you both together, it feels like your relationship is something that doesn’t want to end. Can you work things out?”
I can’t believe I haven’t filled Harper in on everything. I’ve been so caught up in my misery I kept to myself. “He told me he loved me.”
Her eyes widen. “Why do you look sad about it? Isn’t that a good thing?”
I pick some chipping paint off the bench. “He took it back.”
Harper’s eyebrows disappear into her hairline. “He took it back? What do you mean?”
I rub my palms along my thighs. “He didn’t actually say the words. Something happened and he retreated into a hole and hasn’t come back out.”
Harper taps her fingers on her forehead. “Wait…wait…You need to explain this.”
I tell her about the most exciting night of my life. The night the man I love told me he loved me too. It was magical. I could see my life with him. It was perfect. Until it wasn’t.
“The walls around him had fallen. Then we have unprotected sex and they snapped back up higher than they were before. Itold you about Rachel’s visit to the studio, and things got worse. I can’t see the man I love anymore.”
“Oh, Alyssa.” Harper rubs her hand on the back of my shoulders. “He’s in shock. That’s all. After what he’s been through, it was a reflex reaction. He’ll come around, and I know he’ll feel like crap for treating you this way.”
I shake my head. “No. It’s over. He’s only concerned about the blood test results.”
“Is there any chance you might be pregnant?” Harper asks as she gently rocks the stroller when Avery makes little squawking noises.
Deep down I know the answer. It’s like a little current of electricity is buzzing through me, igniting everything it touches. I don’t want to say it out loud, because I don’t know how I’m going to deal with it if it’s true.
My phone rings, stopping me from answering. It’s probably Hayden wondering how much longer I’m going to be. Pulling the phone from my pocket, I glance at the screen. It’s not a number I recognize. Could this be the hospital?
“Hello,” I answer on a shaky breath.
“This is Dr. Hofstein. Am I speaking with Ms. Martinez?”