I know this is what I want, and I have wanted it for a while now, but it’s going to be my first time and with the literal sin of lust. I don’t know how I can even compare to anyone that has been in his bed before. I don’t know what I’m doing, and it’s not like there is exactly anyone I can ask who isn’t related to Silas. Yet another reason I wish I had another woman to talk to.
I’m going in blind, and I don’t know what to expect.
I just know in my heart that I can trust Silas, and I know he would never hurt me.
With everything we have done so far, and how much patience he’s had, I know he is worth giving this part of myself to.
Chapter Eighteen
Silas
I’m shaking so much that I’m surprised Serenity hasn’t said anything.
I have never been this nervous to have sex in all my existence.
This time is different.
While we were talking with everyone, I ask a couple of my brothers to set up my room with candles and black roses.
The gasp of surprise and the smile on her face when she saw our room made it all worth it. They had really gone all out for this.
I would say this is an evil version of romantic.
There is only a soft glow in the room, and Serenity tells me she needs to freshen up first. I nod my head and swallow hard.
Fuck, get it together man.
I take off my suit jacket and lay it down on a chair before selecting music to help set the mood. It had been so fucking quiet when we got in here that I could hear my heart beating.
I undo a couple buttons of my shirt and roll up my sleeves.
Serenity opens the door. I turn around and swear I forget how to breathe.
She has on a red teddy night gown that reveals her body underneath, but it’s covered just enough to tease me. Just one glance at her has me weak in the knees.
Serenity is a gorgeous woman without a doubt. She doesn’t show her body off and never has felt the need to. Thankfully for mebecause I love that I will be the only one to see her this way and know what her body looks like underneath all of her badass clothes she has started to wear all the time.
I have to remind myself that this is her first time, so I can’t toss her around and turn her body into a pretzel just yet.
“Fuck,” I rasp.
I hold my hand out as she walks towards me. When she’s close enough, she places her hand in mine. That’s when I notice how much she’s shaking.
“I’ll take care of you, baby,” I say softly to her.
“I know, I’m just nervous,” she whispers.
“I am too,” I admit. I don’t care if you aren’t supposed to admit that. I’ll always be honest with her.
She pulls back slightly and looks skeptical.
“How can that be?” she asks.
I chuckle lowly.
“Baby, it’s you. You’re my everything. This moment is everything I have been waiting centuries for.”
I grab her face in one of my hands and lean down to kiss her slowly.