“Yes,” Catherine said, glaring at her brother.
Jaden looked between us. “That’s weird.”
“Eat your sandwich,” Holland said.
I looked at my chicken and wondered if anyone my size had ever escaped through a restaurant bathroom window. Cole asked about prospects camp. I gave him clean, boring answers. Nothing that involved the word prospects in any context that would make Catherine make that strangled little sound again. Because I was reacting to her, and that was dangerous. It wasn’t just the sex. It was the way she sat with her family. The way she rolled her eyes at Jaden and softened when Holland asked if she was tired. The way she pushed back at Cole without ever doubting that he loved her. She was part of a big, messy, loyal family that had its hands in every corner of my life. And I wanted in. Not as the captain invited to lunch or as the guy everyonetrusted to do the right thing. I wanted in beside Catherine. That thought scared the hell out of me.
“So,” Holland said, turning to her daughter with a tone that made Catherine immediately sit back.
“No,” Catherine said.
Holland blinked. “I haven’t said anything.”
“You used your mom voice.”
Jaden pointed his fry at Catherine. “It was her meddling voice.”
“Thank you,” Catherine said.
“Don’t thank him,” Cole said. “He’s enjoying this.”
“I am,” Jaden confirmed.
Holland ignored all of us. “I was only going to ask if you’ve thought about dating again.”
Catherine closed her eyes. I focused on cutting my chicken into pieces much smaller than necessary.
“Mom,” Catherine said, her tone chiding.
Holland softened. “I’m not trying to pressure you. I just don’t want Julian to be the reason you stop letting yourself have a life.”
The table quieted. My fork stilled. Catherine’s face changed fast, but I saw it. The small flinch. The quick tightening around her mouth. She recovered almost immediately, but not before anger moved through me. A deep, steady dislike for a man I had never met. Julian had made her question things she never should have had to question.
“I have a life,” Catherine said.
“You have school, the hospital, and hockey,” Holland said gently. “That’s not the same thing.”
“I’m busy,” Catherine countered.
“You’re twenty-four,” Cole said. “Busy is allowed. Hiding isn’t.”
Catherine looked at him. He held her gaze, and his voice softened. “You don’t have to prove you’re fine by never wanting anything.”
Well. That one hit close. For both of us, apparently. Catherine looked down at her plate. I wanted to take her hand under the table. I didn’t, though, because I liked breathing.
Jaden groaned. “Are you guys talking about feelings?”
Cole pulled his wallet out and handed him a few bills. “Go play the game near the front. Stay where we can see you.”
Jaden slid out of the booth so fast he nearly took Holland’s purse with him. “Don’t talk about kissing while I’m gone,” he called over his shoulder.
Catherine covered her face. I was going to pass out.
Jaden disappeared toward the small arcade machine near the entrance, and the energy at the table shifted.
Holland took a sip of water and looked at Catherine. “For the record, I don’t think you need a relationship. But I do think you need to remember Julian doesn’t get to be the last man who made you feel anything.”
Catherine’s throat moved. I felt that sentence in my chest.