“I’m not here to explain,” I blurted before Cameron could speak. “Or justify what I did. Or even fix it.”
Cameron folded his arms loosely. “That’s new.”
The silence between us weighed heavily.
“I left because I was scared, not because you did anything wrong.”
Cameron’s jaw tightened a fraction.
“I told myself I was protecting you,” I continued, the words sounding raw. “But I wasn’t. I was protecting myself, from being wanted.”
Cameron looked away, his gaze focused on the window as if that was safer than looking at me. “You didn’t give me a choice.”
I flinched. “You’re right.” I had no defence. “I decided for you, that you’d be better off without me. And that was unfair. And arrogant.” My voice cracked. “Not to mention cowardly.”
Cameron’s voice was quiet and flat. “It hurt.”
My throat burned. “I know.” I took another breath, not to steady myself but to stop
from reaching too far, from asking for too much. “I don’t want to promise you I’ll never get scared again. That’s just stupid, because I know I will. That’s not going to vanish overnight.”
Cameron turned to face me. “Then why are you here?”
I met his forthright gaze. “Because I don’t want to run when it happens. I want to stay. Even when I’m terrified. Especially then.”
Cameron’s arms loosened slightly, but he didn’t unfold them. “And what if I can’t just…” He swallowed. “Pick up where we left off? What if I don’t trust you yet?”
I nodded without hesitation. “Then I wait.”
Cameron blinked. “You’ll… wait.”
“Yes.”
“For how long?”
“As long as it takes.” I didn’t break eye contact. “Or until you tell me not to.”
Something fragile hummed in the room, the possibility of hope.
“I thought you’d come back with a speech,” Cameron said in a low voice.
I huffed out a breath that was almost a laugh. “Max advised against it.”
Cameron’s lips twitched before his expression sobered. “I need to know something. If this gets hard again… will you disappear?”
Iron hands tightened around my chest.
“No. I might freeze. I might shut down for a minute. But I won’t leave without talking to you. Ever again.” I poured my heart and soul into those final words.
Cameron searched my face.
“You don’t have to forgive me,” I added softly. “You don’t have to choose me. I just needed you to know that I’m choosingyou, even if you don’t choose me back.”
The words sat between us, raw and filled with hope.
Cameron bit his lip. “You’re an idiot, do you know that?”
“Yeah, I know.”