Arthur opened her door and Wren slid inside, but as he began to close it, Wren stuck her foot out to block it open.
“Charlie, you’re the best friend I’ve ever had and the most wonderful human I’ve ever met and I hope you and Tristan have the most adventurous fantastic thrilling first year of marriage of all time OK BYEEEEE!”
“No fair!” Charlie squealed as Wren closed the door, then held up her speech again and mimed tearing it up.
Arthur climbed in and closed his door, started the engine, and shifted the truck into drive.
“Are you OK?” he asked Wren.
“How can I not be?” she said, but her shaky voice betrayed her. “Now, hurry up, I want to see the Pacific Ocean before it boils over.”
They’d mapped most of it out in excruciating detail. Arthur figured they could get there and back in just about two weeks if they minimized their stops, which he knew full well they had no intention of doing. He had created an intricate itinerary that would keep them on schedule, for the sake of baby Liam’s routine, and Wren was going to inevitably wreck it with unplanned detours to see wacky roadside novelties. And they wouldn’t have it any other way.
It would be the adventure of a lifetime, or the start of it, anyway.
“Any final thoughts before we go?” Arthur said.
Before Wren could answer, Liam chimed in from the back seat with a wet, shockingly loud fart. Ferdie, curled up on a blanket next to the car seat, lifted his head a smidge and sniffed the air in approval.
“What he said,” Wren said.
Epilogue
“Everybody hurry up and getin here!” Arthur shouted from the living room, a happy Liam on his lap babbling and chewing on a plastic set of multicolored car keys.
Wren and his parents rushed in, holding glasses of champagne.
“Jeez, what’s the rush?” Wren said, settling in next to her boys on the couch.
“I don’t want to miss it, that’s all,” Arthur said, then, looking around: “I said everybody!”
And now here came Tristan and Charlie from the other room, in hideous holiday sweaters, red-faced and puffy from wine and too much of Arthur’s mom’s homemade charcuterie board.
“By the way, I have a few notes on the tattoo sketch,” Wren said to Charlie as they found their seats. “Since it’s my likeness, I feel like I should get a say.”
“We can workshop it,” Charlie said.
“OK, do we all have a drink?” Arthur said.
Everyone held up their glass.
“Do we all have someone to kiss?”
Each couple squeezed together.
“Does anyone have a poopy diapy?” Arthur asked, holding Liam up and giving him a quick sniff.
His dad raised a teasing hand, and his mom immediately pushed it down, taking the opportunity to lock their fingers together.
“Here we go, then,” Arthur said, pointing the remote at the TV and hitting a button.
On the screen, a cartoon New Year’s countdown began, with a band of jungle animals wearing party hats and dancing around with kazoos as a little jingle played.
I can’t believe
It’s New Year’s Eve
So much to do