I twist in his grip. “That’s sick. It’s crazy.”
“Listen to me. The cartels are sick and crazy. They own the politicians and run towns like they’re the real power behind the throne. All I do is provide a product to rich assholes who want to fuck all night and dance all day. I don’t murder people for no reason. I don’t terrorize an entire country. I run a business, that’s all.”
“Why are you bringing the cartels into this?”
“So you understand that’s not what I am. I’m a part of a larger organization. It’s a family.”
I laugh wildly. “Have you lost your mind?”
“The Corsetti Famiglia’s been my home since I was young. Stellan Corsetti found me, became my only friend, and gave me a purpose. I know it’s hard to believe, but the Famiglia is everything. It’s not evil, not the way you think.”
“You’re criminals. This is mafia shit.”
He nods. “Yeah, baby, that’s exactly what it is.”
“No, I can’t, this is too much, I don’t?—“
His hand snakes into my hair again. He tugs, pulling back. His mouth finds mine, crushing into me with a bruising kiss. I twist, pushing, whimpering as his taste floods my senses and I hatehim for doing this to me, for making me want him while also hating him, for driving a confusing spike straight down into my skull, for leaving me a pathetic, bloody, twisted mess.
I don’t know what I am anymore. I don’t know what he’s made me.
“Nothing changes,” he says softly as he pulls away, breathing hard. I feel him stiffening against me. His thigh slips between my legs. I shudder, gasping. “You aremine, Deanna, and I’m not letting you go until I’ve gotten my fill.”
“When’s that happen? When I’m dead or behind bars?”
“I’ll cut my own throat before either of those things happen.”
“I don’t believe you. I don’t know what to think anymore.”
“Then think this: we have a deal. I’ll take care of you and your parents. I’ll make sure no harm ever comes to you. I’ll give you so much more than you ever dreamed, and all I ask in return is you stay by my side until my job is finished.”
“What job?” I whisper, not sure I want to know.
He shakes his head. “We aren’t going there. Not right now. You’re overwhelmed enough already.”
“Fuck, Prime.” I lean forward, forehead to his chest. “What are you doing to me?”
“Taking care of you. Always, Deanna. I swear it.” He breathes deep, smelling my hair. “I know I should have told you earlier. I won’t keep secrets from you.”
“So you’ll tell me what you want with that Fontana guy? The one you’re looking for?”
“Soon. Not now.” He draws away. I’m left against the copier, heart racing, feeling like I’m even more lost than before. “Take some time to acclimate to our new reality. Take the day off if you want.”
“No. I have work.”
“Suit yourself.” He gives me a lingering look. “Come visit my office if you need to.”
“I’m fine.”
“You will be.”
He leaves and I turn around so he doesn’t see me gasping for air, doesn’t see the flush of desire on my cheeks, doesn’t know how badly I wanted him to keep going—and how that makes me despise myself in ways I can’t fully understand.
Prime makes me feel like I’m the center of his universe. It’s incredible, the intensity of his need and his attention.
But how much of myself can I sell to stay by his side? How much more can I lose?
I know what I’m gaining. I see it whenever I visit home. My mother’s so much happier and my father seems relatively stable with constant help.