Harper made eye contact and nodded. “Yeah, I know. Sorry, I don’t know why I said that.” She hated that she never said whatshe really wanted to when she was with this woman. Maybe that wasn’t true. It was probably more like, she never said what she should.
“Good. Now, how about that ice cream?”
Harper wasn’t entirely sure how Charlie could pretend like all that eye contact hadn’t happened in the class. Or that her hands on Harper’s body hadn’t felt intense.
Though maybe Charlie hadn’t felt anything she’d been feeling, and that was why she was fine. The thought of it made Harper feel a little queasy. Although it would bebetterif this little crush that she could no longer denywasone-sided, the thought that it might be was a sharp hit in her solar plexus. Even if she wasn’t going to act on it.
“Sure. Did you want to change or anything?”
“No, I’ve gotten comfortable walking around like this. In what is essentially a beach town where everyone is a tourist, I think yoga clothes fit right in.”
Harper chuckled. “Yeah, that’s true. Okay, I won’t change either. Just let me grab my bag.” She put on more deodorant while she was in the small locker room but otherwise didn’t change. While she was washing her hands, she made eye contact with herself in the mirror and reminded herself that she needed to do the right thing. Which was push the desire that was getting stronger and stronger down until she could root Charlie firmly in the friend zone.
She could do this. She was sure she could.
“Oh my God, this might be the best ice cream I’ve ever had,” Charlie said, gushing over her butter pecan in a plain cone. “And I don’t think it’s because I’m still riding the high from teachingfor the first time ever.” She took another lick around the outside of the cone and tried not to groan at how delicious it was. They walked side by side along the water, listening to it lap at the seawall.
“It’s the best I’ve ever had too,” Harper agreed. “You had a great idea to walk while we eat. It’s so nice out tonight.”
Charlie smiled as the breeze blew some of Harper’s hair out of her ponytail. “How’d you find this place?”
“I was struggling when I first moved here, and one of the ways I forced myself to keep moving was to try a new dessert somewhere on the island every day. That was my reward for doing all the things when I was having a hard time. And this was one of the last places I tried, but I can confirm that it is the best ice cream on the island.” She shrugged, and Charlie felt a strong need to know what was going on in her life back then.
“How long have you lived here?”
“A little over three years, though sometimes it feels like six months, and sometimes it feels like six years.”
“Time is weird like that.” Charlie took a deep breath and hoped this didn’t overstep. “If you don’t mind me asking, why were you struggling when you first got here?”
Harper looked at her for a long moment before taking a lick of her peanut butter cup ice cream and pursing her lips. “If I tell you, will you answer a question of mine? A little quid pro quo, if you will.”
“You really are a lawyer.” Charlie chuckled and bumped their shoulders to make sure Harper knew she wasn’t being serious as they walked aimlessly through Old Town after their stretch of shoreline went from public to private.
“Was. Iwasa lawyer. I’m not really anymore.” Harper shook her head as if emphasizing her point.
“You still volunteer at a legal clinic. That’s still being an attorney, isn’t it?” Charlie said, confused. Their armsoccasionally brushed as they walked, and she tried not to read too much into it.
“Yeah, but it’s not my career anymore. It’s not how I define myself. I don’t feel like an attorney. As an attorney, I worked about a zillion hours a week to keep those billings up. Now it’s more like a hobby.” Harper shrugged. “Anyway, do we have a deal?”
“I guess so,” Charlie finally said, a little worried about what Harper might askher.
“Okay.” Harper took a deep breath as if steeling herself to tell her story. They came upon a small public beach that seemed deserted. “Do you want to sit over there for a little bit?” She pointed to a small pier that jutted out into the water for about fifteen feet.
It was the smallest pier Charlie had ever seen. “Sure,” she said, hoping her feet would dangle in the water.
Once they were settled, Harper said in a matter-of-fact manner, “I was married, and my wife died very unexpectedly.”
Charlie hadn’t been expecting that. She had noticed an indentation on Harper’s left ring finger and a faint tan line when the light hit it just right, so she wasn’t terribly surprised that she’d been married, but Charlie had assumed divorce. She seemed incredibly young to be a widow. “I’m so sorry, Harper. That must have been terrible.”
“It was. It’s been three years, but it’s still hard sometimes.” She cleared her throat. “So where’d you come from?” It was a clear attempt to change the subject, and Charlie would accept it. For now, anyway.
“I used to work on Wall Street. You know from my driver’s license that I’m from New York, but I live in Manhattan. Used to. I used to live in Manhattan.”
“What brought you to Key West?” Harper asked.
Charlie chuckled. “That’s two questions, so you first.”
Harper sighed. “Fine. I needed to get away from everything routine. Kelly, my…wife, and I got together in law school. We moved to Chicago—where we’d both grown up—after graduation and accepted offers from the same firm. After she died, I couldn’t stand being there anymore. Every place I looked was saturated with memories of her. Of us. When we’d talked about retirement, I always wanted to buy a sailboat and sail around the Caribbean, but Kelly said that was really impractical because we would run out of money. She wanted to move to Key West and buy a cute little tourist bar that we could give a legal and queer flare, so here I am. Living the retirement dream my wife wanted because I couldn’t handle living the life we’d actually shared without her.” She sniffed and looked out at the water.