were missing—it was because ofyou.”
He reached for my hand and I shoved him, almost pushing him off the bed. I didn't want, or need, his comfortI stood,
stumbling as I tried to balance myself. My feet stung with each step I took towards the balcony. I needed fresh air as much as I
needed to be sick and to clear my mind of everything.
I wasn’t sure what I was feeling anymore. My vision became fuzzy and my mind was even more confused than before.
“I am sorry, Ornella, but I couldn’t risk you figuring out who I was after my parents died.” He appeared behind me and
gathered back my loose strands of hair as I leaned over the balcony, emptying what little I had in my stomach. “I never meant to
hurt you. I only wanted to take away the pain your uncle had caused you,” he paused, as if he was choosing his next words
carefully. “Eventually, I started to take your memories of us. After my father forbade me from coming to see you, I could see
and feel the pain I was causing you by suddenly disappearing. I thought it would be best if I made you forget me, too.”
“The best for who? You?” I demanded coldly. “You say you don’t want to hurt me and for me to trust you, but right now, I
don’t even want to look at you.”
I felt as if my heart were breaking all over again, from the moment of his rejection, to his disappearing during those weeks,
and then remembering he left me for years.Many, many years.
“Please leave,” I whispered, hoping he would listen as I turned my back to him.
“Ornella.” My name fell from his lips like a broken plea.
“I said, leave,” I said more firmly this time.
I stepped forward, trying to put more distance between us. I could hear him trying to move closer to me. I wanted to scream
and shout at him, but he was the king in this world. I had foolishly agreed to stay here—to be his ever-devoted servant and
obey.
Except right now, I was not in the mood to serveanyone.
“Stop! Don't you dare take another step in my direction, Nicholas. Leave me be,” I snapped, my voice seeming to chill the
night air by several degrees.
He stopped then, a few heartbeats passing before he retreated from the balcony and out the door. Only then did I fall to my
knees and cry, purging everything I possibly had until I was exhausted and craved sleep. Hoping I would be able to close my
eyes and not dream, I made my way to my bed and crawled beneath the covers. I didn’t even bother to change my clothes.
He was the stable boy I’d given my heart away to one summer. The boy I told my secrets to and shared my dreams with.
Someone I had trusted more than anyone else in the world…and then he left, taking my memories, and breaking my heart in a
million pieces. I was never the same again.
I always felt something was wrong. That something was missing within me. I just had no clue it was because of him.