My deductibles were also extremely high, so it added up fast. I constantly felt like I was drowning in medical bills. It’s such a relief not to have to stress about the price of my prenatal care.
“You won’t have to worry about that anymore.” Heath promises as he slips an arm around my shoulders, and I melt into his hold, letting out a slow breath I didn’t realize I was holding. “Ready to meet our baby?”
I offer him a tentative smile. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”
“That didn’t sound very convincing. What’s on your mind?” Heath’s voice is laced with concern. “The nurse said this would be a routine appointment, remember?”
“What if something’s happened since I found out I was pregnant?” I shift in my chair, leaning closer to him. “I should have come in sooner.”
I’m not sure why I’m suddenly so anxious. Until now, I’ve been content going with the flow and letting Heath handle the logistics. But it just hit me that the only thing tying us together is this baby—and if it were gone, he wouldn’t have a reason to stay, and the thought alone makes me feel nauseous.
We’ve only been married for a short time, but I’ve already grown so used to his company. Every morning, he stays in bed with me as I check my blood sugar, then adjusts my breakfast based on the reading. And ever since the night he stayed late at the ranch, he’s made it a point to be home in the afternoons when my “morning” sickness hits like clockwork.
“Hey, none of that now,” Heath says softly, brushing a thumb along my cheek. “We’re about to hear our baby’s heartbeat for the first time. Kind of crazy, right? Until now, it’s been an abstract concept, and I’m excited for it to finally feel real.”
“Yeah, it really is,” I whisper, resting a hand over my stomach. “I’ve been placing bets on whether it’ll look like a scrunched-up alien or a wrinkly turtle. What’s your call?”
“Turtle. No question.” He laughs softly as he brushes a piece of hair from my face. “They’re tiny and have the cutest squishy faces. What’s not to love?”
Be still my heart.
I remind myself that now isn’t the time to let my hormones run wild. Yes, it’s incredibly sweet that he’s basically saying he already loves our baby. That doesn’t mean I should throwcaution to the wind and beg him to pin me down and fuck me—absolutely not.
“Charlie Halstead.”
Heath and I turn to the woman standing in the doorway leading to the back, wearing pink scrubs and holding a tablet.
“That’s us,” Heath says, standing.
He extends his hand, helping me to my feet before grabbing my purse. I know better than to suggest I carry it after his disapproving reaction when I tried earlier. I’m not complaining, though. It’s rather comical watching the gruff cowboy carry a floral purse. If he keeps this up, I’m totally getting him a sparkly pink diaper bag.
“My name’s Katie, and I’ll be your ultrasound tech today. We’ll be in exam room three,” the tech says as she leads us down the hall. She stops by the door and gestures for us to enter. “Mama, go ahead and lie on the exam table for me. Dad, you can have a seat in that chair next to her.”
I blink, stunned to hear those names out loud for the first time. Somehow, it makes the reality of us becoming parents much more real.
The exam table is tilted so I’m propped up at a slight angle once I’m settled.
I wait while Katie retrieves a bottle from a small warmer on the counter, then pulls up a stool next to the ultrasound machine.
“Let’s get right to it, shall we?” she says with a warm smile. “I’ll have you lift your shirt so I can put some gel on your stomach. Don’t worry, it’s warm.”
“Okay.”
I lift my shirt and unclip my insulin pump, moving it to the side so the tubing is out of the way. I stay perfectly still as Katie applies the gel, watching it spread across my skin while sheslowly glides the probe over my abdomen. After a few seconds, she shifts it slightly lower.
The room is so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Katie’s eyes narrow at the screen as she makes another small adjustment to the right. My heart hammers in my chest as panic creeps in, my mind instantly jumping to the worst-case scenario.
I search the screen for any sign of a tiny human, but I see nothing. I’m struck by how fiercely protective I feel over someone I haven’t met yet. I realize nothing matters more than knowing our little peanut is okay.
“Everything okay?” I ask, my voice rising.
“Bear with me for just a minute,” Katie says calmly, adjusting the angle again.
I’m on the verge of tears when Heath’s warm hand wraps around mine, grounding me instantly. I glance over to find him offering me a reassuring smile as he presses a kiss to my palm.
“I’ve got you,” he murmurs.
The panic doesn’t disappear completely, but it fades into the background under the steady comfort of his touch—a silent reminder that whatever happens, I’m not in this alone.