‘I doubt it,’ she mutters.
I pretend not to hear.
‘So, can I at least say goodbye to the girls before I go?’
‘I think it would probably be better if you don’t. They’re both asleep now, and if you said goodbye just before school tomorrow morning it would be a bit disruptive.’ I couldn’t cope with a tearful goodbye. I have the feeling Sadie would make a show of it and the girls would end up begging her to stay.
‘But won’t they wonder why I’ve gone?’
‘Don’t worry, I’ll explain it to them. Thanks for being so understanding,’ I add, trying to cut our conversation short. I get to my feet. ‘We really are very grateful for everything you’ve done.’
‘Please don’t sack me,’ she begs.
My heart sinks. I feel like such a heartless bitch. But what’s the alternative? Keep her here while I watch my family fall deeper and deeper for her charms, edging me out. Making me feel like a stranger in my own home. I have to stay strong and follow this through. ‘I’m not sacking you, Sadie. We’re letting you go. It’s nothing to do with your work. Your care for the girls has been brilliant.’
‘So keep me on! I can help you out. You can give me more chores to do. I don’t mind.’
‘Sorry. I can’t.’
‘You mean you won’t.’ She clenches her fists and sits back down, her whole body sagging. ‘Fine. I’ll leave first thing in the morning before the girls are up.’
‘That’s probably best.’ I can’t think of anything else to say, so I give a small nod and leave the room. Walk back down the stairs to the rest of my house. A house I can start to reclaim tomorrow. This whole encounter has left me feeling wrung out and guilty. Like I’m some evil stepmother who’s mistreating a stepchild. But I’m not convinced Sadie’s distress is even genuine. The girl is a chameleon. I don’t trust her and I need her to leave as soon as possible. I wish she would go right now. But I guess tomorrow morning will have to do.
As I reach the landing, I hear the front door open and then close with a bang. Robert is home. I take a breath and prepare to tell him what I’ve done. I only hope he doesn’t try to talk me out of it.
Forty-Four
As Gemma’s footsteps recede, I begin pacing the attic room. I had to force myself not to yell at her when she was giving me that ridiculous story about no longer needing me. Of course she needs me. I’ve made myself indispensable. And I bet Robert doesn’t even know what she’s done. He’ll stick up for me. He won’t let her get rid of me, will he? Ugh, I know he’s not likely to side against her. She’ll twist him around her little finger.
I pick up a cushion from the sofa, press my face into the soft cotton and let out a muffled scream of frustration. I can’t believe I haven’t managed to do what I set out to achieve. I’ve failed yet again. I shouldn’t have wasted so much time being so cautious, but I thought I had weeks, months to accomplish my goal. Now it’s all been for nothing. Again. It should have been so easy. I was halfway there. Robert trusts me, I know he does. And I’ve seen the way he looks at me. At my body. But it had to be done slowly. My first impression of him wasn’t quite right. He’s more loyal, more sincere than I hoped. Which is why I was moving slowly. If I’d launched myself at him, he would have recoiled, bolted.
But bloody Gemma has ruined everything. I think I overplayed my hand with the perfume. I wanted to sow a seed of doubt between them, increase the tension. But I didn’t think it would end up with me being booted out. I’m so angry with myself. But I’m angrier with her. I thought she was wedded to her career. She’s changed. I’ve forced her to change. Nothing like an interloper to make you re-examine your priorities.
I thought my tears might sway her, but she’s tougher than I thought. Hard as nails, actually. It made her uncomfortable to see me cry like that. To know she was the cause. But she held firm anyway. Part of me admires that about her. Maybe that’s why she’s a successful businesswoman – you have to think with your head rather than your heart.
I take a few deep breaths and try to think rationally. Okay, I might have to leave here, but it’s not over yet. I can spin this to work in my favour. There are still one or two last opportunities open to me…
Forty-Five
‘What are you talking about?’ Robert says, pouring himself a glass of water.
‘I’ve decided to work fewer hours. So we won’t need Sadie any more.’
I’ve just told Robert that I’ve promoted Damien at work, which means I’ll be able to devote more time to the children at home. He doesn’t look impressed.
‘Is this because you smelt her perfume in our room?’ Robert asks. ‘Is this some misplaced jealousy thing?’
‘No. It isn’t.’
He lowers his voice. ‘Where is she, anyway?’
‘Up in her room.’
‘So you didn’t kick her out onto the street, then.’ He scowls.
‘Robert!’ I shake my head, annoyed.
‘What? I’m just checking.’ He leans back against the worktop while I stand in the doorway. ‘You’ve had it in for her for weeks, Gem. It’s not like you to be so… mean.’