But then I realized that if I died, she’d eventually belong to someone else. He’d make her laugh. She’d tease him with her sultry voice. They’d have a family of their own.
Un-fucking-acceptable.
Lilith and I will lead a long and—one day—happy life. Together.
The elevatorpings, the sound light, unlike the loud roar of blood between my ears.
I smooth down my gray T-shirt and shove my hands into my jeans as I head over to my apartment.
As soon as I step inside, a question rushes into my mind.
What if she wasn’t manipulating you?
I don’t know.
I don’tknow.
My headache worsens as doubts start piling up. Doubts that weren’t there earlier, when I bathed her again, helped her to the bathroom, and let her drink a protein shake for dinner through the gags.
One thing I’m sure of is that I’m sick of holding her captive.
I just want things between us to go back to how they were.
I just want her.
And she’s…asleep.
Even though I’m standing in the doorway, I can tell she hasn’t so much as stirred while I was gone.
When she’s awake, the air is lighter. My space warmer.
Now silence, the heavy kind, presses in on me. It’s another weight on top of the guilt over thisthingI’m doing. Holding the woman I love captive, silencing her, monitoring her every move…
My teeth grind audibly, the sound thunderous in the quiet apartment.
It’s been a little over twenty-four hours, and I already can’t take another second of living in this body.
These hands, these muscles, this fucking brain inside my head—they’re to blame for having Lilith bound not only to the bed but to me.
However. I can’t bring myself to let her go.
I won’t.
As one obsessive thought chases another, a dark, primal feeling sneaks up on me. A thief in the night.
The longer I stand here, the more it festers. Grows. Takes root.
I want her.
My cock has never been thicker. Never felt like it was going to rip through my jeans.
Looking at her, hugging her, that won’t do anymore. Won’t quiet the storm inside of me.
If I could only swipe my tongue over her clit, once, while she’s asleep…
I—no. Fuck no. I won’t violate her. Won’t put my needs first and harm her in the process.
I’ll die before I do that.