It takes her several more moments and a deep breath before she manages to reply, angling her face away from mine. The words come out little more than a whisper.
“It made me feel like I was worth more than sex.”
Her words press into me like a knife—piercing the core of me and stealing my breath. Emotion is swift to burn my eyes.
Violette turns, attempting to curl into a ball, as if caving in on herself.
“Oh, Vi…”
With one arm around her back and the other sliding beneath her knees, I guide her curled-up form to rest against my chest and abdomen. Her body trembles as she finally releases a soft sob—something I can imagine she’s been bottling up for as long as she can remember.
I press soft kisses to the top of her head as I cradle the back of her head with one hand. “I’m gonna spend the rest of my life proving to you just how much you’re worth, okay?”
She replies with a hiccuped sob. “B-but our bond…”
My own tears tremble on the banks of my eyes as I clutch her more tightly against me and attempt a soothing tone. “I don’t give a fuck. It’s changed nothing. I want and need you just asbadly now as I did then. If anything, its absence has given me clarity.”
Her sobbing eases, but she shakes her head weakly against me. “Something will happen. One day, you’ll decide you want something else, something more, and you’ll leave?—”
“Violette.”
She stills.
“I am not your father.”
Violette sniffles. “My parents weresoulbound,and hestilldidn’t stay. He treated her like garbage. How will you ever stay without it?”
The truth reaches my lips quicker than I can even think, and I swear speaking them feels like an out-of-body experience. Like I am both my mother and my past self, watching my present self speak them. Like karma has altered reality to reach this point of my surrender.
“How could I ever leave when I don’t want to live this life without you, Violette?”
She finally tilts her head to lift her watery eyes to mine, brow furrowed.
“You say thatnow,but?—”
I huff a dark laugh, shaking my head.
“Woman, I would carve a hole in my chest if it meant you’d call me your home. Feed you my innards if it meant sustaining you. Give you my eyes if it meant you being able to see you the way I see you. Rip my fucking heart out if it meant that you’d be able to feel just how much I love you.”
Violette’s lips part as her eyes frantically leap between each of mine, searching for the verity in my words.
I take her head in my hands, sitting up and hunching over so that I can bring my face closer to hers.
“Do you understand?”
Her throat works, and more tears spill, beckoning my tongue and lips. I collect each salty gift, murmuring against her cheek.
“I should probably apologize now for the fact that you’ll have to endure the lifelong burden of my love…” My lips roam from one cheek to the next. “But if it’s any reassurance, I promise to try my best not to escalate beyond beingmildlyderanged.”
The organ in my chest thumps a heavy, needy beat for her, further excited by the breathlessness in her voice. “I think that just may be your best quality.”
My mouth widens in a grin as a dark chuckle rumbles from my chest.
“The feeling is mutual.”
Violette rears back on a dramatic gasp. “I amnotderanged.”
I nod, drawing her closer again. Bringing my lips within an inch of hers. “You are. And every time I see that highfalutin mask it’s hiding behind slip, it makes my fucking dick hard.”