Hysterical laughter burst out of me.
Your parents’ first impression of me was a potential threesome candidate. Unicorn, anyone?
When our feet hit the first step the door flew open with two smiling people bursting out of it. Two very familiar people.
When their eyes met mine, it took them a second to place me. I watched the shock plaster over both of their faces when they finally put my face to the reason they recognized me.
Easton wasn’t his normal observant self, because he completely missed the silent exchange I had with his parents.
“Mom, Dad, this is my girlfriend, Rachel. Rachel, this is my mom, Kelly Ann, and my dad, Robert.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper.
Easton pulled me against his side and kissed the top of my head. “She’s nervous. I told her you guys are going to love her almost as much as I do.”
I closed my eyes, willing myself not to get sick.
His parents are fucking Kelly Ann and Robert. What the fuck did I do in a past life to deserve this shit?
His parents didn’t miss the fact that Easton had said he loved me in front of them. Kelly Ann shook out of her shock first and pulled me into a big hug.
“Hi, Easton has told us so much about you. Please, come in.”
Robert hugged me quickly before pulling Easton into the house.
“Rachel, why don’t you help me in the kitchen?” Kelly Ann asked, winking at Easton when he glanced at me with worry.
I shot him a wobbly smile, proud I hadn’t puked yet.
“Oh, my fuck,” I said when it was just me and Kelly Ann.
She started to giggle, putting her arm around my shoulder. “Well, this was unexpected.”
Another hysterical bubble of laughter burst out of me. “You can say that again.”
“Oh, Rachel.” Kelly Ann leaned against the kitchen counter and laughed.
“I’m so sorry, Kelly Ann. I had no idea that Easton was your son.”
She put a hand on my shoulder to stop my rambling. “Honey, he never needs to know. We both know that we were never going to go through with that ridiculous threesome.”
My eyes went wide and I glanced around, positive Easton was going to jump out of the corner with disgust on his face.
“I know, but—” I started, but she interrupted me again.
“But nothing. My son has been gushing about you for months now. We never thought he would fall in love after that horrible bitch broke his heart. Robert and I already love you. Let’s forget about that silly misunderstanding.”
I leaned my head against the refrigerator, most likely leaving an oil patch on the stainless steel. Kelly Ann rubbed my back.
“I promise it is all going to be fine, honey. I promise you nobody’s kid wants to know about their parents’ sex life. Easton will be better for not knowing. Would you want to know about your parents’ sex life?”
“Ewww.” I shuddered at the thought.
“My point exactly. Now let’s get out there before Robert and Easton start talking baseball and that will be all they talk about during dinner.”
“I wouldn’t mind talking about Trip Butler,” I said, calming down a little.
Trip Butler was the pitcher for the San Diego Pappi’s and the hottest athlete known to man. He was also very committed to his wife.