I stood up quietly and took my pajama pants and my broken shirt from the floor. I wore them as I walked to the door. I grabbed the handle and twisted it slowly so as not to wake Lorik.
“Leaving already?” Lorik whispered into my ear. He had portaled himself right behind me already. “It’s becoming common for you to sneak out of my room in the morning.”
“I… I need to leave.” I said, my voice breaking with the feeling again of him behind me. “This is… so wrong. You are a Moonveil.”
“You want me, as much as I do,” he said, kissing me on my neck. The center of me was heating again.
“This was just sex,” I said, cut and dry.
Lorik grabbed me by my hips and turned me around. My back pressed to the door, his gaze right above me, our foreheads almost touching.
“Now tell that to me again, looking at me,” he challenged me.
My lips parted, almost touching his. I stayed there for just a moment, unable to repeat the exact words. So I murmured instead: “This can only be a one-time thing.”
He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. With those words, he knew exactly what I
meant. The line of lust and love was too fine to gamble on sex with the other faction. Your mind and sanity were at risk, plus the weight of the justice of the queen and her court.
“I told you I would never do anything that would harm you.” He finally said. “If I fall for you, you cannot help me escape the curse,” I said firmly.
“How do you know you haven’t fallen for me already?” Lorik responded, brushing his lips against mine.
“You think that much of you?” I teased.
“Just ask yourself, if we didn’t live on an island with so many rules and curses, would you choose me?” Lorik challenged. His expression was flat and serious.
I couldn’t help but widen my eyes ever so slightly. But he noticed, he always did. A smirk pulled out of his mouth as if he were savoring a win.
“I told you I was not going to stay away from you anymore,” he said while opening a portal next to us. “And I plan to keep my word.”
I stood silent, but I didn’t flinch. My eyes were still locked with his. “You wanted to leave. Then leave,” Lorik said. “Just take my portal.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the portal leading to a deep area in the library. That was probably smarter than walking the Nacht Tower with shredded clothing.
I turned around, and before jumping into the portal, I heard him whisper in my ear. “I’ll see you at the Solstice celebration. I won’t be here this week.”
“Don’t bother bringing any roses,” I said with a grin he couldn’t see. And then, I jumped through his portal.
Chapter 32: Confessions
Istood in front of the mirror and barely recognized myself. For months, my reflection had been sweat and bruises, tears and hair pulled back without thought. But tonight, I had used every trick I’d learned in the Glass Castle, lining my eyes in black so the gold stood out, shaping myself into something deliberate again.
For the Solstice Celebration, I wore the look of royalty and nobility, not the soldier I had become. The unease crept immediately.
It felt wrong to be standing here, choosing pins and silk, when war simmered just beyond the veil. Each choice toward normalcy felt like betrayal, dragon attacks had increased again during the week. No casualties this time, at least, though most of the public didn’t know anything. Not even many at the academy. Life continued as if nothing were wrong, and I felt complicit in maintaining that illusion despite my discomfort.
That was when Lorik’s absence pressed in. He wasn’t in Elarion all week as he had warned me. He had been summonedbeyond the veil for the entire week with other second- and third-year students.
Part of me was relieved that my temptation was far away. Another part felt guilty for missing him. Beneath both, I feared what Lorik faced beyond the veil.
The realization left me tangled.
I didn’t know if my thoughts were worry or something riskier.
“I might see him tonight, but I couldn’t examine these feelings now, not with the trials at sunset tomorrow.”
So I didn’t.