“If it’s making you look like that—it’s important to me.”
I look up at him with watery eyes, noting the concern in his features, the genuine want there to make me feel better. It’s almost too much. Tears well up and spill over before I can stop them, and in a matter of seconds, Ian is on the couch with his arms wrapped around me, pulling me into his strong chest as his hand smooths calming circles against my back.
“Talk to me,” he urges. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
“I’ve been so stupid,” I tell him.
He scoffs. “I sincerely doubt that. You’re the smartest person I know.”
“Well, if the last six weeks are any indication, I’d have to disagree with you.”
“You know you can tell me anything, right? I know we haven’t quite…figured everything out between us, but I want to be there for you if you’ll let me, Abby.”
I close my eyes as I bury my face deeper into his chest, no doubt wetting his shirt with my tears, but feeling a strong sense of comfort from his arms around me, nonetheless. It’s embarrassing, how often I’d wanted something like this when I was younger—for someone in my family to justholdme—and I can’t pretend that I’m not relishing it a little now.
“Is it about…Dad?” Ian asks tentatively.
I shake my head. “No. I mean…He hasn’t stopped calling or anything, but it’s not about him.”
“Then talk to me,” Ian presses. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
I swallow thickly, feeling the back of my neck heat as I mumble, “It’s Jack.”
“What? What did you say?”
“It’sJack,” I say a little louder.
Ian is quiet for several moments before he answers, “Do I need to murder him?”
“No,” I say, a laugh tumbling past my lips despite everything. “You wouldn’t do that, anyway. You love him.”
“I would if he hurt you,” Ian says seriously. “Or at the very least, kick his ass a little.”
I give another shake of my head, finally untangling myself from Ian’s arms and sitting back to wipe my eyes. “It’s not all his fault. Not really.”
“What happened?”
“We’ve sort of been…” I bite my lip, feeling mortified to be talking about this with my big brother. “We’ve been—Well.”
Ian sighs. “God. I’m going to owe Lila twenty bucks.”
“What?” I ask incredulously.
“She was so sure this would happen when you started staying there.”
“But we did nothing but bicker! How could she know this was going to happen?”
“She’s an intuitive little thing,” Ian chuckles. “So…you and Jack?”
He makes a face when he says it, and I can tell that he’s as uncomfortable talking about this as I am. “I guess he finally got you back for you and Lila.”
“That’s not what he said, is it?” Ian counters, looking angry.
“No, no.” I heave out a sigh. “It wasn’t like that. He—” There’s a ghost of a smile on my mouth as I remember all the time I’ve been spending with Jack, a pang in my chest that follows it when I recall the look on his face yesterday when he told me he had nothing good in his life outside of hockey. “It was both of us,” I settle on finally. “It just happened.”
Ian makes a face. “I suddenly feel like I should apologize to Jack.”
“Why?”