‘You can never be too careful.’ Nyla’s expression is as serious as if the man’s life were at stake. ‘If you have any questions or feel unsure, get in touch.’
Unsettled, the man runs a hand through his hair.
I quickly wink at him. ‘And next time, please don’t let the garden gnome bite your finger.’
The man laughs hesitantly. But at least he laughs; with Nyla, all I see again is that forced grimace with which she now also says goodbye to the patient. As soon as he has left the treatment room, that artificial something gives way once more to her brooding expression, which by now causes me physical pain.
This can’t go on. ‘Is there a problem?’ I ask carefully.
Surprise appears on her face. For a while she studies me, as if she had to think about her answer. ‘Yes.’
I knew she would react like that or something similar, and still I asked, and part of me regrets it. Another part just wants to see her happy again and is even willing to cross boundaries I have carefully drawn.
‘Can I help you solve it?’ I try to sound relaxed, but I don’t know if I succeed.
She walks back to the treatment chair and places the used instruments one by one into a kidney dish. ‘No.’
Something in me breathes a sigh of relief, something else tightens. ‘Why not?’
Out of nowhere, she stops. ‘There is no solution, only unchangeable facts,’ she says so quietly that I can barely understand her. ‘No one can do anything, it is what it is.’
If that’s the case, then I know what she needs to feel better again: light thoughts, carefree moments, something beautiful to comfort her.
‘There’s a fair going on over in Halifax Common right now. With live music, rides, cotton candy, and street performers.’ I walked past a poster this morning, and now I’m glad it comes back to me. ‘That would be the perfect way to round off the day, don’t you think?’
Briefly, her gaze wanders to the clock on the wall. ‘Of course, the shift is over anyway.’
Wow. That was surprisingly easy. ‘Great, then out of the coat and into the fun.’
‘What? You want me to come with you?’ She buries her hands in the pockets of her coat, every single muscle in her body tense.
‘Sure, who’s going to make sure we have fun if you’re not there?’ I ask, raising my brows meaningfully. That doesn’t work either.
‘I already have plans today, I’m sorry,’ she says curtly, grabs the medical file, and presses it tightly to her chest as if it were a shield.
‘Let me guess…’ I tap my index finger thoughtfully against my chin. ‘You’ve got a date with your cuddly blanket, dried kale chips, and Health TV.’
She nibbles on her lower lip, and that’s when I know I’m right. There is no way she should be alone at home tonight, left to her worries. Especially not when that won’t change her problem anyway.
‘So, a hot foursome. You, the blanket, the chips, and the TV,’ I say, even though it feels wrong to be making jokes right now. It’s stupid, but I don’t know what else I could say.
Luckily, her expression softens a little.
‘I figured as much. After all, I’ve known since our first encounter that there’s a little minx hiding inside you.’ Oh God, what am I saying?
For a moment the corners of her mouth twitch, then she turns to the door. ‘Bye, Jaden, I’ll see you the day after tomorrow at the rescue center.’
No. I don’t want to let her go in this state. ‘You have tomorrow off? All the more reason to enjoy the evening.’
She doesn’t react. If she goes home now, she’ll take whatever is dragging her down with her. If she comes with me, at least she has a chance at a few pleasant hours.
I hurry to the door and lean against it so she can’t leave the treatment room. ‘Your rejection is breaking my heart, you do realize that, don’t you?’
There. A small flicker of warmth in her eyes.
‘And how am I supposed to go on with a broken heart, huh?’ I look at her intently. ‘You’re a doctor, you know that’s not possible.’
Her features slowly relax.