I’m far more relaxed than I was on the stoop, and isn’t this exactly what I was praying for in the time I spent away from him? But somehow I’m disgruntled. I don’t understand it; I don’t wish Mason was mean. That would be wrong.
“Say the words.” His thumb rubs the sweet spot at the curve of my neck.
“Yes, I do,” I whisper. An odd sensation of loss settles over me like a thick blanket, confusing me. I was horrified when I read some of those things—whips and flogging, ball gags and cages, dripping hot wax over a woman’s skin. I shudder. I don’t covet any of that.
A sudden burst of panic sizzles across my skin. My gaze flies to the candles on one of the metal wall sculptures.
My shoulders sag. They aren’t even lit.
“Do you trust me?” Another knot discovered; he works until it unravels.
“Yes, of course.” I do.Why wouldn’t I?
I scan the room. There isn’t a riding crop in sight.
Which is good.
No, great.
Exactly what I want.
Lips brush featherlight over the curve of my neck. “Do you trust me not to cause you harm?”
“Yes, Mason.” Unexpected frustration has me squeezing my lids tight. I want…I blow out a hard breath… I don’t know what I want.
What is wrong with me?
“Good.” Warm palms slide over my bare arms and goose bumps rise on my skin. “This isn’t about force. If things get too much or you get overwhelmed and start to panic, all you need to do is sayredfor short. That’s it. It’s that simple. I’ll stop, and we’ll talk about what’s going on.”
This seems to be some sort of universal. I read about the stoplight system in the list he gave me. I latch onto the tactical subject to distract myself from my strange discontent. I’m not afraid anymore, merely curious.
“In some of the books, they didn’t have that. They couldn’t say no.”
He pulls me close, wrapping his arms around my waist. I turn my cheek and press my ear to his chest, reassured by his strong, steady heartbeat.
“Not everything on that list was meant to entice you.” He entwines our fingers. His strong, tan hand should dwarf my small, paler one, but instead we look just right.
“Didn’t you want me to come tonight?” I ask.
“Yes, I did. Very much.” His grasp tightens as he squeezes, leaning down to nibble a spot between my earlobe and neck. “But it’s important to recognize the good versus the bad. At some point you’re going to say no, and I’m not going to stop. I’m going to keep pushing you, and believe it or not, if this is truly a part of your nature, you’re going to let me. You might scream and yell, but you won’t sayredbecause a part of you will want to continue. You need to learn the difference between that situation and one you truly cannot tolerate. Make sense?”
Nodding, I draw in a deep breath and exhale. I’m certain now I’ll be able to do what Mason desires, and we can stay together. It’s all I was hoping for.
“What’s your safeword?” he asks.
“Red.” The last bit of resistance nestled in the pit of my stomach melts away. This is good. Perfect.
“Good girl.” He kisses my temple and squeezes me tight. His body is hot, warming me all over. “I’m proud of you for being brave.”
To think I’ve been so worried, and for what? Everything is going to work out. I can handle a little bossiness in the bedroom.
“Remember I love you.” Mason releases me and steps away.
I smile. “I love you too.”
He circles, coming to stand several feet in front of me before meeting my gaze. “Strip.”
Surprised laughter bubbles from my throat. “What?”