“I didn’t want to be,” she admitted. “For a long time, I thought it would have been better if I’d died instead of my dad.”
“I would have hated that.”
He remembered hearing about the accident when they were in school and how sick it had made him. Literally. He had puked up his guts.
Of course, there was a good chance he’d been hungover at the time. That wasn’t an uncommon state for him back in high school when it was much easier to bury his feelings than try to deal with them.
Those habits had been tough to break. Even now, there were times he wanted to forget everything and get hammered down at the Rusty Anchor.
He, of all people, knew how infidelity on the part of a loved one could rupture a person’s confidence and sense of self. His mother never recovered from her pain and rejection at being abandoned by her husband, even though Bryce’s father had never been any great prize.
He couldn’t really fault Emma for trying to spare her mother that kind of pain, especially when Rosie was already struggling with the even more devastating grief of her husband’s death.
Knowing that she had carried the burden alone for a decade filled him with an almost unbearable tenderness.
“I would have really hated losing you, Em.” He pushed a loose strand of hair away from her delicate, fragile features and leaned forward, the intoxicating scent of her washing through him.
“I’m glad you’re here. That we’re here together.”
Bryce leaned in slowly, his gaze fixed on hers.
Their breaths mingled for a heartbeat before he closed the distance, pressing his mouth to hers in a soft, heartfelt kiss. Emma’s eyes fluttered closed as she seemed to sag against him, her hands sliding up to rest on his chest.
He cradled her face gently, his thumb caressing her cheek as their lips moved together. The world around them faded away, leaving only the warmth of their connection.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Emma
Emma’s heart raced as she slowly opened her eyes to find Bryce’s intense gaze fixed on her. The tenderness of his kiss had completely destroyed her defenses, leaving her raw and vulnerable.
She struggled to form coherent thoughts, overwhelmed by the rush of emotions coursing through her. Part of her wanted to pull him close again, to lose herself in the comfort and passion of his embrace. But another part—the cautious, guarded part that knew better—whispered urgent warnings.
“Bryce,” she began, her voice barely above a whisper. But what could she say? That the kiss had shaken her to her core? That she didn’t deserve this kind of happiness?
Instead, Emma took a shaky breath, trying to steady herself.
“You matter to me, Emma. You always have.” His voice was low, gruff and slid down her spine like he had traced each vertebrae with his fingers.
She found herself lost in his eyes, seeing an emotion there that both thrilled and terrified her. “I don’t know what to say.”
No. She didn’t deserve to have someone good and honorable like Bryce kiss her with such tenderness. The weight of her past pressed down on her. Running away, the hard life she’d lived, having a baby at barely twenty-one with no dad in the picture. All the people she had hurt along the way.
Bryce deserved someone good and true. Someone whole. Not her.
Summoning every ounce of willpower, Emma pushed him away. “I should get back to work.”
The raw emotion in Bryce’s eyes pierced her heart. “We need to talk about this.”
“No. We really don’t.”
“You can’t keep running away from me. I have feelings for you. I had a crush on you when we were kids, and since you’ve been back, that crush has become something much more.”
Emma wanted to plug her ears like a child and flee the room. She had spent so long hurting other people. She couldn’t bear to hurt Bryce, too. But she knew pushing him away was best for him in the long run, even if it was killing her inside.
She forced herself to think of all the reasons they couldn’t be together. He deserved a woman unburdened by the pain and trauma she’d endured. She couldn’t saddle him with all her baggage.
She also couldn’t step into any role at Lucas Construction that might push him out or take away an opportunity from him. He had earned it. He deserved it. She had done nothing but be born a Lucas.