He was partly teasing. And partly not.
“Do you want me to tell you about those things?”
“I think I would like you to save them up, and tell me one per year, on my birthday. I’ll do the same for you.”
“Done,” Lucien said amiably.
They were quiet. Angelique cleared her throat.
“I think Colonel Brightwall and his wife... something is amiss there, don’t you think? He was in Spain for so many years without her. And I sense the tension between them when they’re in the room. And they never use endearments. No dears. No darlings. No sweethearts.”
Lucien took this in. “Not everyone is so fortunate as we are,” he said. “But I think there is pain there. Both for him and his wife. Don’t you?And where there is pain... well, you and I know that one cannot be hurt if there is no feeling. And sometimes the most implacable people hurt the most because they won’t bend. Brightwall is a brilliant, stubborn man and his wife does not strike me as a quiet, biddable creature.”
But he’d said this last bit appreciatively, which made Angelique smile. She was hardly biddable, either. “I’ve noticed how they look at each other. It might be antipathy—I don’t think it is—but regardless, they find each other riveting.”
“Let’s wish them the best.”
They silently did that for a few moments.
“It’s hard not to notice that we have several phases of married life represented under one roof these past few weeks,” she mused. “Corporal Dawson and his wife are the newlyweds. Then there’s you and me and Delilah and Captain Hardy. Then there’s the Brightwalls. And then I suppose we can count Mrs. Pariseau and Mrs. Cuthbert the widows.”
Lucien was quiet a moment. “You’re thinking about all of this because you’re worried something like that could happen to us one day. The distance between them.”
He knew her so well.
“I had gotten so used to people finding love here at The Grand Palace on the Thames, and I love thinking we had a small part in that. It would be sad if it’s the site of an estrangement, instead.”
“That will never be us, Angelique. Even if I need to be away for work, we will not grow apartthat way.” As if to prove his point, he gathered her closer.
“How can you be sure?”
“Well, I cannot,” he admitted, which made her stomach lurch a little. “But we are friends. I like you better than anyone, even though I’m compelled to spend half my time with Hardy and St. Leger lately and they’re admittedly unobjectionable company. But it won’t always be like that. One day you may grow tired of having me underfoot all the time. We married because we love each other, and we chose each other after experiencing much of the bitter life can bring. We know what love is and what love isn’t. And I love you so much that it is nearly as much of a luxurious pleasure to talk to you as it is to make love to you. Nearly.”
“I love you, too. And I like you. And I do miss you when you’re away.”
“And you see, I do not think I will ever tire of hearing you say it, so I’ve an incentive to remain lovable.”
She laughed quietly. “Do you ever feel constrained by our lives here, Lucien? We need to be so adult and decorous. It would be rude to make loud, grunty love when everyone is trying to sleep. And you used to be so wild.”
“Mostly I was wild because I was unhappy. But if we ever wish to be loud, there’s the little country house my father left me. The one in which I grew up. We could run about naked and make love in the grass. Take a little holiday one day.Of course, Delacorte will probably want to come with us.”
She sighed.
“Doyoufeel constrained, Angelique?”
She shook her head. “Mostly... mostly I just feel grateful for our life here.”
“I expect we can find ways to feel wild right here if we choose. Let’s see...”
She exhaled, and leaned her head back on his shoulder.
“We are young and innocent lovers.” She could feel his whispered breath against her ear. “We’ve only just met. The attraction is powerful and new, like nothing we’ve ever before experienced. We have sneaked away for a rare moment together, to the backstage of a theater. We only have a few moments together... they might pull the curtain any moment. And this is the first time you’ve ever been kissed like... this...”
He turned her in his arms so he could kiss her softly, slowly.
“And the very first time either of us will be making love.”
He lowered her to the floor, cushioning her with the coverlet.